dear 2011, EFF YOU!!!!

one thing about this blogging nonsense is that it allows me to vent to a faceless entity. and i tend to talk about myself and personal crap. there’s nothing i post here that is hidden from people that actually know me. if you ask me an honest question, i’ll give you an honest answer.

this year has been a nonstop kick to the balls for me. there were times i was so utterly depressed i had friends at work stop me to tell me they were concerned for my well-being. as soon as one issue cleared up……BAM!!!!!!! something else.

in summation:

Jan-late apr, reported car stolen, base security charged me with making a false statement. Almost kept me from re-enlisting. Was having to rent a car to get to work. I’m really not at a place to be dropping $$$ on a rental car. i was facing NJP, the charges were dropped after i sought legal council.

Mar-was informed I was being sent to gtmo (guantanamo bay, cuba). There are 6-7 people who should have been sent, but I got picked, that PISSED me off. A LOT of favoritism at play.

May- grandmother passed away. Grandfather will follow soon. these are the grandparents that raised me.

my work schedule in consistently inconsistent to the point where my sleep cycle is gone.

The drama with the nieces. They were actually going to move out here.

Management has ZERO clue here. It’s like an issue comes up and they throw a fuck-up grenade on it. It’s like watching a bunch of monkeys trying to fuck a football. *sigh*

i realize that at some point i’m just going to have to stfu and just buy myself some vagasil. but DAMMIT!!! could a fellah catch a break. ok. you can move on. nothing left to see here. if anyone needs me….i’ll just curled up in the fetal positions blabbering, “makeitstopmakeitstopmakeitstop.” lol.

[EDIT: the day i posted this, i learned my cousin in her early 20’s died in a car accident]

the comedy of a beta husband/father

i love louis c.k. this was the first time watching one of his specials since finding the manosphere, and watching it not only drew out laughs, but also “WTF is wrong with you louis” feelings. so watching this made me wonder…..why are you letting your child make you this upset? assert yourself dummy. i have a 3-4 year old neice that shit tests and i’ve never failed one because i call her on her rudeness. louis is expressing rage towards his daughter when he should be teaching/leading her. it’s sad. makes for good comedy on the surface but…REALLY. if i ever become a father…..i hope to God i don’t become like this.

ok….i’ve never been married so i can’t relate, but i’ve always thought this was the funniest story.

Beer can chicken

i gave Bb the choice in what was going to be my next food post between the above mentioned recipe or crawfish/shrimp etouffe. She chose beer can chicken. i LOVE beer can chicken. when i make it ALWAYS gets rave reviews.  i doctor the beer to suit my louis the  XIV palate, so feel free to omit. and i do mine in the oven (for those of you scoffing at the idea: eat me) but if you’re doing it on the grill cook the chicken over indirect heat for about 1 1/2 hours until it’s about 170 degrees.

get one whole chicken (around 4lb s) and remove the giblets. rinse thoroughly and pat it dry. open one can of beer ( i prefer to use a 16oz can since it offers a bit more stability) and pou….drink half. cut the top of the can (i have trauma shears) and make a relatively large opening. add: 2TBS apple vinegar, 1/8 cup old bay seasoning (if you use seasoning salt-use 1/16 cup), one bay leaf, 1-2 smashed cloves of garlic, and 1 TBS liquid smoke, i like  to put a dash of dried chipotle powder but i’m a spice nut. again doctoring the beer can be omitted, but trust me, it’s VERY worth it.

get a baking pan and place beer can in center. prop the chicken on the can of beer (both should be close to room temp btw) and use the legs to make a kind of tripod. tuck the wings up into themselves. rub about 2TBS olive oil onto the skin, then season LIBERALLY with whatever BBQ seasoning you use. i uses a combination of: old bay, mccormick buffalo chicken wing powder,  stubb’s BBQ seasoning, and a LITTLE chipotle powder.

place in a 350 degree oven, it should cook (like grilling) for about 1 1/2 hours.  

when done LET IT REST for about 20 minutes (the heat will rise to cook the meat to safe temps, and the juice needs to redistribute).  to remove- hold the can and using paper-towels to insulate your hand, and pull the chicken off the can. and place chicken on a carving board go to work. works best if you have someone else hold the can and you support the bottom and support the bird with both hands.


this is what it should look like before popping it into the oven.

this is actually the kind of pan i use. finished product. no i didn't cook it.

Women don’t know what they want….

“Do not listen to what girls say they want. I do not care what your mother has told you. The last thing you should do is “be nice, and be yourself”. Girls do not want “nice guys”. They want confident guys.”

this part of Det’s post made me recall a funny story.

i had just gotten home after a 3 year tour of duty in spain, and i met lyssia (i’ve spoken about her in previous posts). this was in november, by december we were a “couple”. well, myself, lyssia and her 2 friends candice and brittany were at the bar lyssia and candi worked at having a drink. these 3 were besties. i’ve known candi since they brought her home from the hospital. well since one of the trinity had a bf, the other 2 were talking about guys. much to lyssi’s credit she didn’t say too much. and brittany and candi weren’t man bashing, but talking about men in general and what they wanted in a guy. after about 15-20 minutes of their prattling on, i finally got sick of it. i blurted out…..

“the 2 of you are out of your fucking minds…..seriously.”

silence. “women don’t have ANY clue what they REALLY want in a guy. and i’ll prove it.” i told lyssi for the purpose of this experiment, her and i WERE NOT dating. i told her i would never hold anything that occurs from the experiment against her and that i NEEDED her to be totally honest during this little game. she agreed. i grabbed a napkin and pen and told her to list ALL the qualities she needed to have in a man she dated. i told her to hold nothing back. i told her to call me back to the table when she was done. i left and sat at the bar. after about 10 minutes she called me back, i read over the list: 14 qualities were listed. FOURTEEN!!!!! i’m not kidding. then i circled each quality that could describe me.

6. only 6. i possessed less than HALF the qualities she needed to have in a man.

i believe they were: humorous, intelligent, cultured, well read (knows books), family oriented, protective. there was a little argument over intelligent and well read, but she said by well read she meant she wanted a guy that liked books and reading. so i gave her that one. i showed the list to candi and brittany and said, “this woman lets me bang her on a frequent basis and i know, not think…..KNOW, that she’s crazy about me.” then added, “this list is bullshit, you ladies have NO CLUE what you want.” i’d like to say this ended the discussion for them….but of course it didn’t. i looked at lyssi and she looked almost drunk, she was absolutely swooning.

which leads to what Det called as “constant” attractors for women:  “…confidence, dominance, charisma, power.” THESE i DO have. and i know that’s what ultimately led lyssi to giving me a shot. of course having candi tell her i was a “really cool guy” didn’t hurt either. i started dating lyssi in december, and ended it in late april.

Detinennui32 offer’s advice to his son.

Detinennui32 is one of the manosphere regular’s who is absolutely amazing when it comes to advice. he shared this write-up with me and i wanted to post it. this email offer’s so much knowledge and clear-sighted wisdom that’s is blinding. i hope you get as much out of it as i did. i keep telling him he needs to start a blog of his own.


Son, I know you’ve probably talked to your mom about girls and sex. That’s fine, but I want you to listen to me

What I am about to tell you about women is not a judgment about women. It is about men’s natures and women’s natures. It is not good or evil, right or wrong. This is just the way women are.
You must accept these as facts of the dating and sexual market. There is absolutely nothing you can do to change any of this. The best you can do is use these facts to your advantage and to help influence things to go your way.

I do not care what else you have heard or what others have told you. It is not true that women are impossibly complex and they cannot be figured out. In fact, once you master a few simple precepts about women, navigating their minds and hearts really turns out to be an easy task.

These are immutable facts of life about women. They cannot be modified or abolished. They can be covered or masked for a time, but their attributes always come out. All women are like this. Teenage girls. Elderly ladies happily married for decades. College students. Dull uneducated girls. Country girls who grew up on farms. City girls who grew up poor in ghettos and working class neighborhoods.

The uptown girl with the designer clothes and Daddy’s Beemer. A girl on her first boyfriend. A girl on her 20th boyfriend. A woman on her fifth husband. Virgins. Sluts. Church ladies (especially church ladies). Housewives. Lawyers. Doctors. Businesswomen. Politicians. Teachers. Waitresses. Secretaries. Chief executive officers. It doesn’t matter their age, race, station, income, socioeconomic status or walk of life. They are all like this, despite their protestations that they are not.

Women hold the sex card. They decide when and under what circumstances sex happens. You hold the investment and commitment card. You decide how much time, money and resources you will give women, how much commitment you will give them, and when that commitment will be made.

Men display themselves to women. Women choose men based on the displays they see and discern. Your attractiveness to women depends secondarily on a few things: your environment, the ratio of men to women in your locality. But your attractiveness to women will depend primarily on the display you make to them: your body and how it looks, the confidence you have in yourself, your ability to dominate and influence situations, and your control over yourself and your circumstances.

Men are attracted to a woman’s physical attributes, youth, and a pleasing personality. Women are attracted to male confidence, dominance and projections of power and charisma.

The way you attract women is to be the best man you can be. Work on your body and keep it reasonably fit. At least make it look like you care about how your body looks. Do your own thing. Do things you enjoy. Get good at something. Do not sit on your behind at home, watching TV or surfing the internet. Get out there and do things, meet people and go places. Have a good cadre of male friends and when you get with a girl, DO NOT DITCH THEM. Have a life separate from your girlfriend. You want her in your life, but you do not NEED her. If she fits into your life, great. If she doesn’t, then end it and move on. Make a life plan for yourself and work on it. Decide what you want to be and work on it.

Do not listen to what girls say they want. I do not care what your mother has told you. The last thing you should do is “be nice, and be yourself”. Girls do not want “nice guys”. They want confident guys.

I do not care what anyone else has told you, or what you have learned in school. Men and women are very different. They do not approach sex or male-female relationships in the same way. A woman’s view of men is very different from your view of women.

Despite what you may have heard from women or read, women are not naturally monogamous. They are not designed to stay with one man. They are designed to seek out and be with the BEST man they can find.

You think that most girls and women are hot. You want lots of women — sexual quantity. To you, most women have at least a few attractive qualities, good enough to have sex with. And if you had the chance, you would probably have sex with more than half the women you meet.

Women are not like that. To women, only a small percentage of men are even remotely sexually attractive. They just don’t see most men sexually. And you get only one chance to make a first impression on a woman. Women have two categories for all men. Category 1 is “I would have sex with him.” Category 2 is “I would never, ever in a million years have sex with him.” A woman puts every man she meets into one of these two categories within the first few seconds of meeting him.

Therefore, most women will not find you sexually attractive. A woman does not really want lots of men. She wants the best men — sexual primacy. A woman goes through a series of men because she wants to find the best men. If she believes you are the best, she will select you until a better one comes along. What a particular woman believes is “the best man” is purely subjective to her. But the constants are: confidence, dominance, charisma, power.

Learn indicators of interest that women give you. Learn what they do that shows they are attracted to you. They are:
1. Going out of her way to see you or talk to you
2. Downward chin tilt when averting gaze
3. Smiling, laughing
4. Letting you into her personal space
5. Light touching

6. Fiddling with her hair or touching her face

7. Hanging out with you or seeking you out to talk to you

If you don’t start seeing IOIs in five minutes, bail out and move on. And when a girl says she just wants to be your friend, she is really saying “I am not sexually interested in you”. And when she says this, politely bail out and move on.

You must remember at all times: THERE WILL ALWAYS BE ANOTHER WOMAN. You can always replace a woman. There are many, many women out there. When (not if, WHEN) one breaks up with you, there will always be another. If you approach and she rejects you, there will always be another. If a date doesn’t work out, there will always be another.

But don’t use your knowledge of women or the principle of female abundance to mistreat them. Don’t blow her off, be a jerk, be rude, or be arrogant. There’s no reason for that. If you do that, word will get around about you, and women will avoid you.

You are going to be rejected a lot. You need to accept that now, deal with it now, and DON’T TAKE IT PERSONALLY.

Girls are going to break up with you. There is no getting around this. When this happens, you need to accept it, take the time to get over it, shake it off, and move on. If you did something to cause it, find out what it is (you will know what it is). If it was wrong or counterproductive, correct it so you don’t do it again with the next one. Don’t beg her to stay with you. Don’t ask for another chance or tell her you’ll change. Whatever you do, DO NOT get hung up on the idea that this girl is the only one for you. It is not true. If she did not like you, another one will. THERE WILL ALWAYS BE ANOTHER WOMAN.

DO NOT make heavy commitments to a girl you just started dating. Don’t spend lots of money on her. Don’t tell her how much you like and love her. Don’t give her all your commitment all at once. Hold back until it’s appropriate. Even then, never, ever let a woman use you or walk all over you. If she can withhold the sex, you can withhold the commitment.

You are going to face fitness tests. She will challenge you to see if you can stand up to her. Simply ignore those tests. Don’t respond to them. If you cannot ignore them, laugh at them. Change the subject and talk about something else. Or turn it back to her in question form. Whatever you do, don’t give her what she wants. When you give in, she will know she can control you — and your relationship is doomed.

You will have to break up with girls. There will be many reasons for this.
(1) She is able to control you, probably because you’ve failed too many fitness tests. You’ll naturally bristle at her controlling you. Just end it. The relationship’s probably too far gone anyway.
(2) She is cheating on you.
(3) Her goals aren’t compatible with yours.
(4) For whatever reason, her life does not fit in well with your life.
(5) You just don’t like her anymore.
(6) She nags and complains at you all the time.
(7) She makes unreasonable demands on your time, attention, money or resources.

When you end it, do so firmly and kindly. Just say something like “I don’t want to date you anymore.” That’s all you have to do. If you want to tell her why, tell her succinctly with not a lot of explanation. Don’t offer to let her “change”. Don’t hold out the possibility of “getting back together”. Just end it if that’s what you have decided needs to be done. And remember: THERE WILL ALWAYS BE ANOTHER WOMAN.


Damn…’s been THAT long.

i just realized it’s been over a month since i started this abortion of a blog. i discovered the “manosphere” back in april after being sent to roissy’s site via the infamous kay hymowahgo-whatever her last names’ article. from there i discovered most of the other sites, then became addicted to “Becoming Alpha”  (which has since been shut down…MISS RIV). i then began to frequent Badger, Riv, Keoni, Yohami, and Johnny’s site on a regular basis. after more than one suggestion this blog came about. i really don’t feel like i have much to offer to the manosphere, and i’m the first person to say i’m not really good with “game”. i post my run-in’s with women just so people can see how i approach situations….TBH, i haven’t been on a date in a REALLY long time. but….i haven’t really tried. i RARELY ONS, because i’ve always said……i’d rather be in a LTR (sorry Johnny, but it’s true) than just run through a slew of women (been there, done that). and where i live….the woman are AWFUL. seriously. add that with the fact that i’m a home-body like a mother fucker and it just compounds the situation. after my time here is done, i’m probably heading back to texas where i’ll scoop up some little mexican lass and spend my days keeping a smile on her face.

honestly i’m VERY surprised at the amount of views i get. sure, i have slow days, but when i see i have +100 views….WTF???? lol. not sure how wordpress collects its stats. i mean when i’m home i’ll hit the blogs i mentioned on my site 3-4 times a night. does each one count as an individual view, or is it a your url is counted once, then that’s it. hmmmm……

i’ve really tried to make this blog different than other “manosphere” blogs, i’m really not even sure i’d qualify as “manosphere” material. so i guess this blog is more just “stream of consciousness” blogging about mostly horse-shit and cooking.  if anyone reads this and learns something that they think helps them learn about relationships (which is why i believe most of the blogs are about) i’m glad i was able to help, but i’d be more comfortable teaching you to poach an egg to make killer egg’s bendict.

now, i have been told more than once on various blogs that i am a “natural”, i guess i understand what that implies just based on the title…..but truthfully, i don’t quite understand what that means (still waiting on the explanation Badger. so fire off that email please. lol). i actually got a copy of “bang” and i just can’t read it. i do 2-3 pages, then i can’t read anymore. which kind of pisses me off because i know what’s inside can/will serve to better my relationships and knowing how “game” helped decent men “save their marriage” makes me wan to TRY and finish it…’s just REALLY difficult to push through it. i recently got a cache of books in and i’m already 1/3 of the way through one after 2 days (“finding your way without map or compass”), because the book is just fascinating.

anyway…….i’m fucking rambling now. so basically, if you come here and like what you see, i appreciate it and hope you stick around.

stay up

The FCUK t-shirt

couldn't find a bigger picture. but you get the idea.

i LOVE this t-shirt. the minute i saw it, i bought it, and it’s been money. every girl that sees it comments about it. THREE different girls brought the shirt up today. i was at a smoothie joint, and i noticed the girl eying it. “i like your shirt.” i ALWAYS respond with the same reaction.

i grin, and i ask, “really? what exactly do you like about it? “the girl grinned and fidgeted (they always do). and she fumbled to reply. “i…i…i dunno, i…..i just like… know.” i kind of think this girl was in high school so i didn’t escalate it further. i would have  invited her into the ladies for more “discussion” if she were older. i may be a perv and a flirt, but i’m not a creep. i ended up telling the girl the my shirt liked her as well. and i left.

i was in my local supermarket, i walked into an empty line and the girl from the next line (relatively cute black girl) grabbed my purchase and told me her line was open. i smiled and walked over into her line, “you smell really nice, what is that?” i ginned and replied, “sorry, i’m a bit gassy atm.” she laughed and asked me what scent i was wearing, so i told her and she says, “i see you decided to wear my favorite shirt.” i just smiled and told her i knew she was working tonight so i decided to surprise her. i’d like to tell you i flirted and escalated with her, but i didn’t. i’m not into her, but this is a typical everyday occurrence and interaction for me with girls i come in contact with.

i finished the errands running at pappa john’s. i was picking up my order and the girl behind the counter was about 5-6. very pleasant girl. her shirt was COVERED in flour. as she laid my pizza on the counter (super-supreme, hold the sausage and pepperoni, extra sauce, half the cheese, thin crust…..this is a relatively healthy meal btw) i motioned for her to lean in for me (great rack on this girl btw) and when  she did, i whispered…”i don’t know if you know this but you have , like, a little flour on your shirt.”  she smiled and said that that tends to happen sometimes. then i mentioned that i’m sure she’s got a black belt in pizza ninja-ry. then she bites, “i like your shirt.” i smiled and her and dropped my line……”really. what do you like about it.” she fidgeted, she played with her hair, and couldn’t look me in the eye. she stuttered that she liked how the FCUK looked like “something else” when you first look at it. “i smiled at her and explained it was a clothing company and it stood for “french connection united kingdom.” and that it a british clothing store. then i added, “but i kind of like where your head was,” and i smiled. i asked her name, and she told me it was sarah. i paid for my pizza and bid good evening to sarah. sarah told me goodnight, and she never quit smiling at me.