Fight Club

it’s really taken by surprise that this whole “male social dynamics” is such a thing of interest to you guys. but since you all seem so interested in reading about it, i’ll do my best oblige.

for as long as i can rememeber, i’ve kind of been a loner. as a kid, i’d go to grandparents and run straight into the woods. i’d stay out all day with my dog. finally i built a small lean to that served as the woodland “honey-comb hide out” (it’s a boy thing ladies, just accept it). as a kid, i was ALWAYS outside playing with the other boys. football, bikes, fighting, you name it. girls didn’t come into play until my junior high years but even as a relatively nerdy, small child i ALWAYS fit in and played well with other boys. and of course it was always one-up one of the other boys. trust me, if you have a boy i’m sure you know “dumb and dangerous” is RIGHT up our alley. i didn’t fight much, but i existed in a world where i was always a potential “easy target” and i took my lump as often as i dished them out. among a group there is a definite hierarchy BUT, there’s more of a “building up” of the weaker boy/s”. i think it’s kind of a shaping tool, whatever weakness’ you might have you hopefully work through to the point where it’s no longer an issue in adolescence. i was small, and i was FAST and nimble. during football i was the go to “deep route burn my defender” guy. NO ONE could keep up with me. and i NEVER got tired (damn you kool-aid). but…..i was timid. you got in my face, i backed down. i was beaten VERY badly until my mother left my father (in fourth grade) so that may attribute to a lot of it. the guys always put me up against bigger guys to build my confidence. eventually, i got over being so timid. if you push me now, i REFUSE to back down. WHAT ARE YOU GETTING AT DANNY!!!!!

well this morning i saw a VERY interesting program on a group out of california. they run an actual fight club. what made this so great was it actually put ordinary men, with minimal fight experience, in the ring for actual rattan (bamboo fighting stick) hand to hand fighting. here, ordinary men that felt like slaves behind cubicles needed a release. fighting was that release. it didn’t matter who won or lost. they were SCARED out of their fucking minds before the fight. it hurt, and primal. but the men all stated that trough the fighting they felt a sense of worth again. when the raiders show up to kill, rape, and pillage…..what the fuck are you gonna Bro? will you cower like a dog, or will go out swinging. i don’t know about you, but i’m not a dog. regardless of what education and socioeconomic status for 1000’s of years, we fought. and we fought because we had to. we don’t fight anymore and a real sense of our “purpose” has been stripped away with it. call me barbaric, call me whatever, i don’t care. i know who and what i am and great deal of comes from me embracing my need to be a “warrior” if needed. i might never need to, but if i ever do…..God help you if i’m pitted against you.

look, it’s all well and good to see brad pitt hashing out tyler durden wisdom and all, but to actually see real men, cowed into submission by modern societal norms, feeling the absolute thrill of really being alive. well, it was pretty amazing. this might be lost on you ladies, but this is more for the guys. unplug. i’m not suggesting you go out and start a fight, but if it’s at all possible, find an outlet that will actually allow you spar. personally i recommend “krav maga” it’s practical and pretty easy to learn. seriously, if you can catch this show, watch it. every man was scared out of his mind before the fight. and when it was over, they were brothers. there’s now a bond. oh….and this place was TEAMING with women to watch the boys act like dumb, brutish boys.

simple repoire among men sometimes isn’t enough. my place in the pack is usually the role of comic relief (that will be another post on this subject) and keeping everyone laughing. but……if there’s a threat, everyone is on equal terms as far as defending the pack. if you can’t help defend…’re useless.

when i was about 10-11 i got into a spat with this kid david. david was the local bruiser of the group. we ended in a one on one grudge match football game with out buddy anthony as all time quarterback. i ended up kicking off to him and out the gate it brutal. on the opening kick-off we ran full speed into each other. neither of us got up right away. from that moment on, it was a normal football game. that one play, that simple act of aggression on both are parts ended the spat. we never fought again.

when i was in third grade i was getting bullied by some kids at my bus-stop. my abuelita noticed some cuts and bruises and asked me what happened. after trying to lie she finally drug it out of me as to my dilemma. “how many boys we talking about?” she asked. i meekly replied, “three.” she nodded and asked, “there one that’s clearly in charge?” i nodded. “good, here’s what you do: get to the bus-stop about 10-15 minutes early and hide. find a big stick and soon as they they show up, run up on the the one that’s in charge and start beating him. but don’t hit him in the head, just the below the neck.” i was confused and asked, “what about the other 2?” the abuelita giggled, “oh don’t worry about them, they’ll be loooong gone once you start on.” i did what she told me, and she was right. and they never bothered me again.

lesson learned: david wasn’t as indestructible as i had made him out to be. and in the second story- take the fight to a bully and use unrelenting force. as the cliche saying goes: “it doesn’t matter the size of the dog in the fight, just the size of fight in the dog.” woof woof.

here’s the video from the show i was talking about.

sorry, this just seemed appropriate:

5 Comments on “Fight Club”

  1. Bellita says:

    That’s a great story from your childhood. How did your abuelita know that about boys? Amazing!

  2. Ribbon Butterfly says:

    More and more I get the feeling that my future son(s) might benefit from attending a military college of some sort… or at least an all-boys-school.

  3. Great story, and your abuelita is a woman who understands men 😉

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