Deti on how to KILL her attraction to you.

for those of you that don’t know deti, i’ll give you a brief run-down: he’s a man that been married for a LONG time. he loves his family and his wife, a VERY large portion of his marriage was “unhappy” and seeped in blue-pill mire. he discovered the blogs and began to employ “red-pill” thought/actions into his marriage now he (and his wife) have a better and more harmonious marriage. in this post deti KILLS it with his list of things NOT to do. he’s been told to start a blog ofter, your’s truly included. we email often and he says he’s more of a commenter and doesn’t want to blog. i’m VERY privileged for him to chose my site to guest post. he’s definitely a blos slut and you’ll see him posting on most of the main sites. anyway, here’s his advice to you.


How to Make Your Wife Lose Her Attraction to You:  Or How I Learned to Surgically Remove Gina Tingles
Does your wife lust for you, burn with fire in her loins for you?   Perhaps she is your personal love slave and you’re a little sick of it because you really, really want to catch that next show on HGTV?     I have just the prescription for you.  What I’m about to tell you will repulse not only your honey, but literally every woman you know.   If you want to live the celibate life, read on, mates.
1.   Be nice to her, and just be yourself.   Gents, if you get nothing else from this little guide on how never to have sex again, this is it.   Be nice.  Nice, nice, nice.   Give her everything she wants.  Don’t ever express opinions or stand up for yourself.   Ask her repeatedly “Are you OK?   Are you all right?   Are you mad at me?”    Her legs will snap shut faster than a rattrap you just set off.  Follow this rule, and you and your dominant hand will get to know each other very well.
2.   Stop caring about your personal appearance and grooming.   Really let yourself go.   Gain 20, no, 40 pounds.   Stop brushing and flossing your teeth, getting good sleep, and exercising.  Let your nose hairs grow out.   Really show her that your appearance is deteriorating.   But more importantly, she needs to get the message loud and clear that you just don’t give a shit about it.
3.   Start getting sexually selfish all the time.     Push her head down there for BJs after you’ve been in your clothes for 16 hours and you smell down there like bleu cheese left out of the fridge for 5 days or so.   Hell, even YOU can smell it.   Always have sex the same way all the time, never ask her what she wants, and always make her do all the work.  Cunnilingus?  What’s that?   And make sure that you always take it intensely personally if she just isn’t up for sex.
4.    Always have “romantic” sex.  This is the opposite of number 3.   Always ask her for sex.  Don’t ever just start initiating.   Always talk it out first, to make sure she’s in the mood.   (Don’t be surprised when it takes an hour and a whole tube of K-Y to get her there.)  Always do it in your bedroom, on the bed, with one of you having your heads on the pillow(s).  Bonus if you always light candles and play Sade or Kenny G on the stereo.   And when you have sex, go slow, like in the soap operas or the romcoms she loves.   Never assert yourself, never do anything you like to do, and never do anything unless you have express written permission from her first.   Above all,  never jackhammer her.   She won’t like it.  The romcoms say so, after all.   Adhere to this rule, friend, and you might just as well stay up late getting to know the porno sites, because very soon, that’s the only poon you’re going to get.
5.     Become a kitchen bitch.  If you go this route it’s really important that you get this right.   Always volunteer to help with vacuuming, or putting away the dishes, or laundry, or cooking.   Doing these chores sometimes will actually get you MORE sex, so that won’t do.  No, what you must do is completely take over all these things, even when your bride didn’t ask you to, even when you never did them before and even when you suck at them.  And you’re doing this specifically because she’s making vague complaints of “I’m tired” and “you never do anything to help me around here”.    Yep, that’s the ticket.   This will show her that you’ll do ANYTHING to please her, even when she doesn’t want you to.  Hear that sound?  That’s the sound of a lovely wife’s legs snapping shut.
6.    Give in to her every request, demand and whim.   Make sure you fail every fitness test.   Never, ever tell her no.  Never, ever stand up for yourself.   In fact, just stop thinking for yourself.  You’ve got her to do all that thinking for you.   Give her everything she wants, when and where she wants it.    You don’t have to lead.  Just let her make all the decisions, even if you think you’ve got a better idea.   Your new favorite sentence is “I don’t care, whatever you want, Honey.”     Dude, you’re doing great!  At this rate BOTH your palms will be furrier than a gorilla’s back in no time.
7.     Give up all the things you were or that you did when you were single.  No more road trips, no more golf trips with your college buddies, no more bowling night..  She’s your everything, ’cause you’re married, dammit.  You don’t need a life plan anymore.    If you really want to turn her off, you’ve got to stop caring about and doing the things that she found attractive about you in the first place.    Hey, your thoughts, your hopes, your dreams, your wants, your needs, your talents, your desires, they mean nothing now.   Hell, even your individuality as a human being can just go out the window if you really want to stop having sex with your wife.
8.    Put up with all her bitchiness.  This should be easy because hopefully you’ve followed Rule 6 and you’re giving in regularly.  If you have, it’s natural that you’ll tolerate her very worst behaviors.  Even the nicest, sweetest wives can be total bitches sometimes.   All you have to do is indulge that conduct.   Never mind that any man saying or doing these things to you would get punched out in a hurry.  No, if you want to go celibate, you just put up with this shit.
When she acts like a total bitch in public, don’t confront her.   No, just say “haha, you’re so funny, dear.”   Even better, laugh right along with everyone else if she holds you out to public ridicule, and never confront or correct that either.   Don’t say anything when she reveals the most intimate details of your married life to her parents, your parents, or her friends, all in an effort to garner support or sympathy, or exert pressure on you.   When you fight in private, let her call you every name in the book, let her dredge up every rotten thing you ever did or said, let her go completely out of control.   All you have to do is — are you ready for this? —  DON’T RESPOND.  Nope, just sit there and take it, and tell her you’ll do whatever she wants.  Whatever you do, don’t take control of the situation and don’t stand up for yourself.  Be a total wimp.   If you do this she’ll be saying “Tingles?  What tingles?”
9.     Show her you are completely dependent on her.    You have to show her you have no life, no opinions, and no purpose outside of her.   Tell her and show her how deathly afraid you are of losing her.   Demonstrate vividly how fearful you are that she’ll divorce you, because you’ll be alone forever and ever, and how much you NEEEEED her.   You have to be very explicit about this.  Don’t be a man.  Don’t be assertive or sparing with your words.   Be a mawkish seventh grader walking around with a raging hard on because he just got a longer-than-5-second look and smile from the cute little blond girl with the bow in her hair.    Be cloying, and lay it on thick.   You have to say things like:
“You’re my life.  You’re my everything.”
“Do you love me?”
“I’d be lost, LOST, without you.”
“I won’t ever fail you!”
Do all this with the look of total and complete earnestness on your face.  In other words, say it to her like you think a girl would say it to you.
My friends, follow all these rules, and, married or single, you’ll never, ever have sex again.  You’ll be as unattractive as rotting onions and sewer gas.
word. lol. stay up.

34 Comments on “Deti on how to KILL her attraction to you.”

  1. 7man says:

    Yes follow this by all means. There is no better plan for a man to increase his CPF (cost per f*ck). Then she will divorce such a wuss and his CPF (retrospective) will continue to increase dramatically. BTDT still paying!

  2. Tom says:

    Deti – great advice. Seriously, get your own blog – you have a lot of wisdom to share, but I think it would be much more effective if it weren’t scattered across the posts and comments of a half-dozen other people’s blogs.

  3. Jennifer says:

    Yipe. Yep, those are killers all right.

    • Jennifer says:

      In fact though, a guy’s “self” is not usually nice, nice, nice. That’s a whitewashed, milky version of himself.

      • Looking Glass says:

        Some of us truly are gentlemen. The issue is one of reciprocity. You don’t get any advantage for being a gentlemen, anymore. As I, and others, have well found out, you’re actively shooting yourself in the foot.

        A lot of it falls down to the Golden Rule and actually acting like it. But one has to now realize that the downside to following the Golden Rule is actively pushed in society: “take advantage of someone else’s generosity, as there is no consequence.” A race to the bottom started a while ago and the old civility will be the price for it.

        The other key aspect, something simply hidden from most men, is that enforcing your boundaries and standards will cover about 95% of the important parts of a relationship. Yes, it can be tough, but if you have them and just hold to them, it will simply work out better. It also gives you enough Alpha to cover most relationships. You just need to have them, in the first place. (I.e. you don’t supplicate yourself, which is a direct result of boundary enforcement)

        • dannyfrom504 says:

          LG- “The issue is one of reciprocity. You don’t get any advantage for being a gentlemen, anymore. As I, and others, have well found out, you’re actively shooting yourself in the foot.” VERY true. my more “gentleman” side is reserved for women in the same regards that my cooking ability is reserved. she’s either a woman i’m related to, a woman i’m VERY good friends with, or a woman i see naked on a frequent basis. if you don’t fall into one of those 3 camps, you don’t get my goodies.

          living in the south there is certain behavior (among men AND women) that was prevelant in my youth, but seems all but dead now. one of my female readers lives relatively close to me and she talks of certain “manners” she was taught that “a lady MUST keep in mind”. i’d bet money Bb would agree on that as well. i still hold doors when a woman is a few steps behind me and, i’ll typically open the door and let a woman enter a building before i enter. if i’m with a gf: i usually open and close a car door for her, hold a door open and rest my hand on the small of her back as she enters, and maintain a VERY protective posture while out and about with her. i’ve never had a complaint either.


          the SECOND i feel that side of me is NOT appreciated, i’ll start withdrawing myself from the relationship and offering said services less and less ala my own “shit test”. either appreciate what i bring to the table, or beat feet toots. i can always find a new container to store my mule.

        • I think LG hit the nail on the head with talk about –boundaries–

      • dannyfrom504 says:

        well the boundaries are also a springboard for a woman’s shit test’s. “oh, he HATES rom-coms….humph, i bet he’ll watch ******* if i tell him i want to see it.” IF i watch it, she DAMN SURE better show appreciation and more than likely it’ll be a flick that i can have SOME if not little interest in. some, i’d flat out say no and tell her to watch it with her gf’s (ie, think twilight). and if she sees i’m paying little to no attention to it and she gives me shit…..she get’s “the look.” mentions it TWICE, and i’ll quit watching all together and go to another room.

      • The real ( uninhibited and unapologetic ) self not being nice is something I am still trying to figure out whether it is true. I have read that theory quite a few times now, used by those who wish to adopt jerk behavior . I agree that a typical ‘beta’ would smile more and perhaps show excessive concern for a trifle without the requisite mockery or cockiness. That is whitewashing. Or to not challenge her with your own opinion etc.

        I would only ask a woman ‘are you ok ‘ if she’s crying , but only once . Or , with closer friends, if her face spells thunderclouds. Attention seeking behavior should not be taken seriously though. ( e.g. ‘ ouch I just hurt my fiiiiiinger ‘ )

        I do hold doors when someone’s behind me , for both men and women because I expect and receive that gesture from others. And ‘ ladies first ‘when I enter a venue with friends is also something I instinctively do. It is usually appreciated . Not sure whether I should ditch it, I enjoy tradition . A few women acquaintances I have spoken to while walking from class to class did not hold a door when they reached it first . I think that’s more of an IOD than incivility . ( are they distinguishable? ) … But then again, I don’t do that shit to someone I’m not sexually interested in.

        It’s ABG/ABP btw.

        • I agree with Jennifer… The true self is not nice, nice, nice. For example, you wrote “I would only ask a woman ‘are you ok ‘ if she’s crying , but only once.” This statement didn’t seem to be filled with genuine concern, but instead the question might be uttered out of a sense of obligation. I wouldn’t consider that nice, nice, nice… Alpha response yes, but nice, nice, nice… no.

      • dannyfrom504 says:

        again, to me it’s not about giving in or dominating…’s about knowing what i want and standing up to/living up to my expectations. i’m at no woman’s beck and call and a woman isn’t at mine. in a relationship a woman can handle 99% of the shit she has going on, i rarely need to step in and help her with her affairs. i see myself as that ax behind some glass. she only comes to me when shit’s serious. BUT….she knows i’m there and when i have to make a decision….that’s it. again, she typically doesn’t come to me for shit. but while all this is going on, i’m doing my OWN THING. i have my own affairs that i’m attending to. so, i support her, she supports me. it’s that simple.

        and “are you ok?” is only uttered by me when it’s CLEAR she’s not. and instead of “are you ok?” i think “what’s wrong?” is a stronger frame. you’re asking because OBVIOUSLY she’s NOT ok, so be direct and get to the point.

        what are you wearing? lol.

      • Jennifer says:

        Oh, I love gentlemen, LG. But being nice no matter what starts to seem artificial, and it’s like being happy all the time, basically.

  4. Ok, Deti— You won me over with this one! You are totally right. That’s just NOT sexy. No girl wants to lay a “yes man”.

    It’s the same in reverse too. Any time either gender gives up who they are and focuses solely on the other person… it will kill the attraction.

  5. Rivelino says:

    excellent. this would make a nice contrast to roissy’s XVI.

  6. MissMarie says:

    Right on, all the way. Especially with the “Are you okay?” thing – I work with a LOT of men, and there are times I’m upset. Most of them either leave me be or tease me when this happens, these are the cool guys I respect. There are a couple that will-not-quit with the “Are you okay?” and it drives me insane. If I wanted to talk about it, you’d know. There’s only one guy I know that I’m close enough to and can tell when to push when there are ‘thunderclouds’. I don’t want to be grovelled at, I’m a big girl and I can take care of myself. When I can’t, I’ll ask for help.

  7. MissMarie says:

    You’ll like this one, Danny… I went on a date with a guy, 35 years old, and he actually told me, “I’m the kind of guy that will go to the store and get you tampons and not complain about it.”

    O – M – G, Srsly?!

    What girl over the age of 13 doesn’t have some clue that the need for such things occurs fairly regularly and that you could, you know, buy enough when you go to the store?

    He said I wasn’t appreciative enough and obviously had never met any “real nice guys.” Mmmm, sure I have. Good luck, buddy, lmao!

  8. MissMarie says:

    The man actually argued with me about it!!!
    Him: “But, what if you were sick?”
    Me: “I was sick for a whole month and couldn’t leave the house? Perhaps I should be hospitalized in that instance…”
    Him: “But, but, but, it’s the nice thing to do! Assholes wouldn’t do it!”
    Me: “You mean, those assholes that you keep complaining about girls preferring? Hmmm…”
    Him: “God, you women really ARE all bitches!”

    Needless to say, I got out of that date early enough to go let some asshole at the bar buy me a drink… 😉

  9. Great comment Danny. That was a terrific description for those of us who like looking for a partner, not a pet or a project. & black lace 😉

  10. Handlingtheredpill says:

    Cadence : ‘ I agree with Jennifer… The true self is not nice, nice, nice. For example, you wrote “I would only ask a woman ‘are you ok ‘ if she’s crying , but only once.” This statement didn’t seem to be filled with genuine concern, but instead the question might be uttered out of a sense of obligation. I wouldn’t consider that nice, nice, nice… Alpha response yes, but nice, nice, nice… no. ‘

    Correct . Mostly obligation yes . Concern only if I have known her for a while. …. I don’t cry often so I find it hard to ignore when anyone does. It depends where it occurs. If her girlfriends are around or can be reached I will not speak; neither if she’s obviously trying to be alone ( by walking away from a group) .

    @MissMArie …. I WILL remember what you said there . A lady in distress must not be treated like a child 😉 I get a strong urge to protect women when they appear sad , as yuck as that sounds …

    Your date anecdote reminded me of the time I thoughtlessly greeted a woman with ‘ hey bitch ‘. It was the day after she called herself that (and more) on IM . This was pre-redpill , I was nervous with her and I felt horrible saying that as I had pedestalized / liked her a lot , but to my surprise she laughed out loud . I had no clue that being ‘cocky’ (with a woman) was a good thing and that I shouldn’t feel guilty for it if played right. She was self-deprecatory around me—maybe she was qualifying herself?

    @Danny . . ‘what’s wrong ‘ is a much better frame now that you mention it. I have used that one more often than the ‘ok?’ , but not intentionally .

    Insightful what you say about boundaries, ‘doing your own thing ‘ and her doing her thing while giving mutual support. I would need to learn these things in the future. My parents –as much as I like them–gave me a bad template to work with in that they showed no boundaries at all . My dad is a typical AFC with no social life/hobbies; my mum usually confused and moody . They would even involve me and my sister in their quarrels and try to get us on their side. The past is the past I guess. But what a healthy relationship looks like from close up? I don’t know.

    • dannyfrom504 says:

      HTRP- “I get a strong urge to protect women when they appear sad , as yuck as that sounds…” if i don’t see her naked on a frequent basis, or she’s not family. she can deal with it without me.

      “But what a healthy relationship looks like from close up? I don’t know.” easy. you be yourself and let her be herself. if it’s right it’ll be apparent. if it’s NOT, you move on. i see too many people trying too hard to make something work that just isn’t there. if it’s not right, there’s nothing wrong with tapping out.

      no point in wasting anyone’s time.

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