Busting BallsPosted: January 3, 2012 | |
i guess this is you ladies chance to peer inside the locker room.
since everyone seems so interested in this crap i thought i’d touch on something that’s crucial to fitting in with a group of guys: busting balls. seriously, the inability to do this will land you in the out with the pack. i have a 2 blacks belts in this subject matter. i have a dark gift for figuring out someone’s neurosis root and attacking it with unrelentless persistence. the WarMachine is a HUGE guy, i can run him off in 15 seconds by teasing him about how “pretty” he is. the civilians LOVE it when i start on him. he walks away EVERYTIME muttering, “yer stoopid bro.” he’s embarrassed and somewhat blushing when he walks away. and get this…WarMachine is from a NOTORIOUS part of LA…..Eas’ Los (east LA), and since he’s Asian and was living in a predominately mexican area, he was an emissary between the various “sets” in La Puente. here’s the neighborhood entertainment: the various set’s would pit different kids (think 7-10 years old) against each other in fist fights. the WarMAchine was NEVER beaten. they couldn’t jump him in, because he was able to take 4-5 guys on at once. he was basically an Asian Cholo and he got a TON of women (still does). this guy is one of my best friends out here.
attempts to bust on me is usually a jab at my height or paleness. heard them all before and the best way to deal with it is to agree and amplify. “wow danny, how long have you been cooking for?” i’ll answer, “hell since i was able to look over the stove.” her, “how old was that?” i’ll give a look of confusion before replying, “shit…i dunno, 17.” wokka wokka. put yourself on blast and give the other person no where to go as far as fucking with you and you take away their power to give you shit. when i run this bit i’m basically telling the other person i’m aware of my height and i doesn’t bother me.
another thing….whenever you can make another guy uncomfortable with gay jokes and come-ons….ALWAYS GOLD. dude seriously, this is one of the best ways of busting on a dude. all gay material is appropriate in regards to giving another guy shit. anyone that complains, get’s skeeved out, or can’t one up you….LOST. lol. i was talking to our new guy at work (a 25 year old hockey goalie) and he was laughing when i was telling him this, “hell yeah dude.” he replied laughing. when i hang out with my skater friends back in NO, it’s a big “fuck with the other guy with some good-natured ribbing” scenario. i get along VERY well with all the alphas at work, and we have at least 3 VERY beautiful women in my department, these 3 women are VERY good at busting on guys. NONE of them has EVER gotten the best of me, and they all typically concede to me when we start messing with each other. they throw a crack at me….i escalate it to the nuclear zone and they laugh and typically tell me to shut up. lol. one of them is a tall Mexican girl and where i fire back at her, her usual reply is, “whatever loser.” thats her supplicating to the exchange. BUT….it’s fun to do, and keeps the work place from being boring. now….you ONLY crack on people that are part of the pack. there are 2, maybe 3 guys that none of the alpha dudes bust on. they aren’t worthy of that esprit de corps.
so get some thick skin, have some fun and give your buddies a hard time. it’s fun and it’s how the guys show camaraderie.