Deti explains how to screen for a wife.Posted: January 19, 2012
this was posted on Badger’s site here:
Deti’s been married for a minute. he give’s GREAT advice. when i read 2 of his comments i thought, “fucking brilliant”. i asked for his permission to post it on my blog and he said yes. here it is:
I read your plaintive queries and your heartfelt blog. In my opinion, your goals are admirable but probably unrealistic. I say as a man who’s been (mostly) happily married for 15 years that I would recommend traditional legal marriage only after undertaking Dalrock’s wife interviews:
1. Love is not enough to sustain or even create a marriage. Nor is beauty, intelligence, virtue or femininity.
2. The only things that will create and sustain a marriage are a small modicum of maturity, some good chemistry between the two of you, and a truckload of commitment.
3. A lot of women you meet will be unfit for marriage. Most will lack either the maturity, the chemistry or the willingness to commit.
4. You will not get everything you want in a wife. You might get most of it, but not all of it.
5. She will never be everything you want all the time.
6. Marriage is not constant hot sweaty sex.
his second comment:
I am in this until one of the following happens:
1. She dies;
2. I die; or
3. There are valid grounds for divorce — adultery, abandonment, abuse, addiction. That’s it.
“What is something you wouldn’t have known (in my position, single and late-20s) that you wish you would have known then?”
The true nature of women. They don’t think, act, talk or reason like men.
In intergender relationships, men think, women feel.
If you want to know her, ignore what she says and watch what she does.
She wants the best man she can get, and you’ll do until someone better comes along.
Live your life according to your wants, needs and desires, not her reactions to them.
Don’t fear her. Don’t be afraid to:
1. Tell her no
2. Tell her to STFD and STFU
3. Make the rules
4. Decide the plans
5. Direct the relationship
6. Lose her
ok, i’ve never been married, so all this is fascinating to me. Deti’s my go-to-wife screening home-skillet. if i EVER have a question, i’m emailing him. lol. stay up Deti. you’re a stand up individual. if we ever get the chance to hang out, i’m buying the first round.