What’s REALLY important

i was done.

we’d been dating for 3 months and i knew i wanted out. the girls i worked with were friends with the gf and pulled a quasi-intervention. long-story short, my co-worker ladies told the gf i wasn’t happy. the gf was VERY surprised.

“but…why isn’t he happy, he’s getting laid.” smh. of course my girls are TOP-NOTCH and saw red-flags immediately and told her my getting laid was NOT going to keep me around. the gf was thoroughly and honestly confused. i have to admit, from my point…..it was over. i ended it maybe a week or two later.

fast forward to her wanting to have “the talk”. now….this girl was VERY into me. but…she didn’t have much guy experience. i shoulder some responsibility there because i KNEW that going in, but after 3 months…i had ZERO attraction to her. so i ended it.

 

and she.was.crushed. i learned this from the guys in her shop. she was a fucking zombie. one of my girls in medical MADE me tell her why i ended it. and she was right. the ex deserved to know the truth. so….i made arrangements to give her my perspective about the relationship. there were quite a few issues, but she dropped this BOMB on me. she mentioned she didn’t get why i wasn’t happy when she was putting out.

 

i went into the red IMMEDIATELY!!!!! i fired off, “DO YOU THINK I CAN FUCK YOU 24 HOURS A DAY???!!!!” her face dropped and i could see she knew she made a misstep. i continued…..”dammit, we’ll spend what…..1-2 hours a day having sex, 8-9 hours sleeping, what the fuck do i do with you for the other 13-14 hours a day. because it WON’T be spent having sex. i’m not with you because i just want to fuck you; i LIKE you. i wanted to have you around me. now i DON’T want you around….and i’m SOOO not even thinking about sex with you.”

that’s enough. basically she left the exchange abruptly, and she was crying. the point of this post is that soooo many women are worried about being hot and sexy, BUT….a good man can fuck a hot and sexy woman easily. he just won’t keep her around. but he WILL keep a cool, fun, and giving woman around. the ex took took took took took and i eventually got tired of her. but the woman who’ll win my affection will be a decent woman that puts the same effort into me that i put into her. because if she’s a good woman, i WILL put the effort in. as the saying goes…..

if the sex is good, it’s 10% of the relationship. if the sex is bad, it’s 90% of the relationship. i’d love nothing more than the ladies reading here to work on being great woman, not vixens. i’ll totally fuck a vixen, but i’ll KEEP and fight for a great woman. but being knee-deep in the SMP, i can tell you….most women aren’t concerned with being “great woman”. hell….most of them already thing they ARE great women, yet, have the same mentality the ex had.

 

 


16 Comments on “What’s REALLY important”

  1. Athor Pel says:

    I wonder whether the ex girlfriend actually learned anything or did she reject the lesson entirely?

    Next question, if you weren’t having sex with her how long would the relationship have lasted?

    It seems a lot of girls these days think the only thing of value they have to offer a guy is their vagina. Makes me wonder how they were raised. Just what did their parents teach them? Did they teach them anything of value or did they leave it all up to the public schools and television?

    • It seems to be based on fear (offer sex or he’ll leave you) and the idea that since all men want is sex anyway, just fork that over and you’ve covered everything.
      Now, I’m not saying I haven’t met a depressingly large amount of guys who have that attitude (and I avoid them like the plague). I’m just saying that you can be taught to cover all the bases and still have that fear. The prospect of being rejected on both a sexual and an emotional level is utterly terrifying. I don’t know if it’s moreso for women–probably not–but when you observe “sexy” getting more attention than “reliable,” be it in media or via social experience, it can trigger a major adaptation in the girl’s idea of how to compete with what she’s seeing as other girls who are outdoing her in terms of appeal.

      I didn’t sum that up well, sorry.

      • dannyfrom504 says:

        here’s the thing- i didn’t end it with her directly because she’d have taken it to hard. she was CRUSHED when i ended it. so i let my leaving for san diego be the “reason” for the break (see i’m not a total dick). when she admitted she was hoping i was going to propose i called her to drop this bomb on her.

        “is you mom a good wife girl?”

        she said she was and i asked her what made her a great wife. the ex started with this list of all the shit her mom does then finally she got quiet and i heard her voice crack, “oh my God.” i replid:

        “exactly. how much of that did you do for me?” she didn’t answer. she told me she had to go. that was the last time i spoke to her, but we chatted a few times on myspace before she finally started dating her now husband.

        i’d be willing to bet she didn’t forget the conversation we had once she statred dating him.

  2. ASF says:

    Initially, a girl’s only value IS her vagina. After you spend a little time with her, you can determine whether that’s all she’s good for or whether she brings something else to the table. Most girls think that merely showing up is all that’s required, but if you want commitment, ladies need to step their game up.

    • dannyfrom504 says:

      agree to disagree. guys that have to work to get or don’t get pussy value it. when i open or engage a woman, i already KNOW i want to fuck her, but it doesn’t mean she can’t blow it by being uninteresting.

      when i started with the woman in this story, i KNEW i was gonna get the V, but it was her personality that kept me going with her. then her personality KILLED it for me. and trust, the sex WASN’T the problem, this girl had talent. she got me to give her a second chance, and she did it by showing me her better side (she’s VERY funny and VERY easy to chill with) and i generally liked having her around. but after a 3 months it went right back to me doing all the work and her just “being there”. when i left japan….i didn’t look back. it was DONE.

      • Allie says:

        How did her personality kill it for you ?

        • dannyfrom504 says:

          she was selfish. she didn’t take are of me. it was all take take take on her part. i don’t mind doing what i need to in a relationship, but it was one sided.

          i eventually lost my attraction to her.

        • dannyfrom504 says:

          lol. WELL BEFORE i was blogging i had internalized a “you have a vagina, SO WHAT” mentality. guys would do much better if they adopted that mentality and embraced women for more than just a sexual outlet.

          she was selfish. she didn’t take are of me. it was all take take take > on her part. i don’t mind doing what i need to in a relationship, but > it was one sided. > > i eventually lost my attraction to her.

      • ASF says:

        I’m not sure if we really disagree. But I’m not some fancy pants blogger who can explain things clearly. 😛

    • dannyfrom504 says:

      ASF-

      lol. WELL BEFORE i was blogging i had internalized a “you have a vagina, SO WHAT” mentality. guys would do much better if they adopted that mentality and embraced women for more than just a sexual outlet.

      AP-
      she was selfish. she didn’t take are of me. it was all take take take on her part. i don’t mind doing what i need to in a relationship, but it was one sided. i eventually lost my attraction to her.

  3. “But I have a magic vagina, why won’t you be enslaved?”

  4. I agree Danny,

    I don’t think she would ever forget you. You did her a favour in many ways.

    What a hard lesson to learn, though! Poor girl. I do somehow sympathise with her.

    • dannyfrom504 says:

      thank you Love.

      well, she IS mexican; so she had to learn the hard way.

      she’s married and has a kid last i heard. but we don’t speak anymore. i’d still be her friend, but i don’t think she’s capable of “being friends” with me. lol.

  5. I’ve noticed this a lot in younger girls. Its funny how feminism has actually come so far as to become its own enemy. Women have become so sexually free that their only value (in their eyes) is that hole between their legs, rather then the value their mothers had like caring for a home, cooking, raising children, ect.

    Modern girls dont do anything a man cant do himself, except have a vagina, but despite all that when you meet a really cool chick you do like her, but they have trouble understanding that.


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