Just Be YourselfPosted: May 7, 2012
my post featuring an interview in what shay maria finds attractive in a man has gotten a little bit of a talk going on. in particular the line where she tells men to “just be themselves”. i happen to agree with miss maria, whole heartedly in fact. but i think some of the guys that say JBY is bullshit are looking waaaay too into the the red-pill mindset and not into the more practical reasons to JBY.
now….if a guys just running game to get laid, JBY isn’t really a factor. if you just want to get laid, you know the drill. no point into going into all that……there are PLENTY of other sites teaching men all that. that’s not MY site. i’m more relationship minded, and keeping with that- JBY is in fact a necessity.
i HATE being asked, “what is it you look for in a girl you date?” by a new or potential gf. seriously, i NEVER answer it. firstly i don’t want to pigeon-hole a woman (well, except….you know) by what i may or may not like. i want to experience HER. i want to discover HER, i want to learn what moves her. to me that’s the best part of having a new gf. in my experience, it’s best to take my time and discover if the woman is right me by JUST BEING MYSELF. in return, i’ll do the same. either she’s feeling me or she’s not, and VICE VERSA.
i think JBY is pretty basic. i’m not going to agree with something she does just to gain favor with her or to be agreeable. at the same time i don’t expect her to bend to my each and every…. let me rephrase that. i don’t want her to act in a manner she thinks i’ll approve of. that’d be disingenuous. when it comes down to it- either you’re good together, or you’re not. it’s that simple. i have certain characteristics that i NEED in a women, if i don’t see them….well, time to move on. the last gf was a cool, feminine, likable woman. BUT……there were things i was able to discover by spending time with her that told me she just wasn’t right for me; so i moved on.
JBY means being you and holding her accountable if/when she messes up. it DOES NOT mean supplication and pedestalization. i think men and women can agree on that one. i just feel like some guys are getting too hung up on the game side of JBY and not focusing on the practicalities of JBY.
when i meet a potential new gf i act like the same individual writing this site. a few of the readers have spoken with me or know me personally and can vouch for that. i don’t act any different. think of a friend- you’re probably friends with that person because by and large, you both get along well. you may not see eye to eye on every issue, but you respect their individuality. to me, it’s the same with screening a new potential gf. i know who and what i am, i know where i’m going. a cute face and body isn’t going to change that or compromise my sensibilities or morals.
because i’m ME, and pretty decent me if i may add. stay up