How to be a Good Girl from….a good girl

I had an interesting comment to my Padawan from a “life long good girl” who’s been married for 22 years. She goes into much more detail as to how to maximize a woman’s SMP value.

Such an interesting situation! I am intrigued. I am a life time “good girl” who has been married for twenty years to my first and only. Typing this, I am horrifyingly aware of how the stats alone place me in a category of woman who is out to pasture and beyond any useful or decorative purpose to most in the manosphere. So permit me the indulgence of qualifying I am unapologetically feminine in dress, speech, grooming, and carriage. I did not get fat, and the shoe and lingerie component of my wardrobe support my assertion on a daily basis (not just for special occasions) without being extravagant. While maintaining these things as a reflection of my true inner self, and for the edification and entertainment of my husband, I do not apologize for contributing my share the global feminine energy and appreciation of anyone who cares. All of that being said, I may have something to contribute to your young friend that I believe is the result of a lifelong way of life as opposed to a fad or for purposes of manipulation.

First; I have a question. Is it not contrary to the type of masculine companion that she is looking for to ask if the man is single? I am not playing games when I say that I think her need to pursue a man’s interest has already disqualified him if he fails to notice her once she has prepared and presented herself in a manner that reflects her knowledge of herself and interests, her most flattering grooming, and most optimistic, authentic interest in him as a human being. I believe everyone has a right to be the architect of their lifestyle of choice, without judgement. Harem, no harem, MGTOW, married, celibate…okay as long as you know yourself and offer the same unapologetic disclosure to those you wish to share your life or time with. It is when people are deceived that they are hurt. This lovely flower is asking for a man to take the lead. A man of integrity has the right to ask for the same respect and effort in return.

Here’s my advice to Mara;

Take care of yourself. Head to toe. Hair, skin, nails, face, teeth. All should be natural and shining and the best of what you can make of what you’ve got. This means spending time to learn about skin care to make sure it is moisturized and glowing. No amount of makeup will cover grease and poor nutrition and fatigue.

Make appointments to be waxed. Or if you can’t afford it, shave your legs and armpits and commit to whatever level of hair removal you wish to maintain in the bikini area then stick to it, daily. No days or weekends off.

Choose a lightly fragranced body wash and exfoliate in the shower neck to toe weekly. Men like smooth skin. Take the time to moisturize every time you get out of the shower. This routine will make the most of what you’ve got and you will feel incredibly sensual and glowing.

Find a reasonable hairdresser you can afford to see religiously every 6 weeks to maintain a haircut with a natural colour that suits you (shoulder length minimum- men appreciate long hair). Make sure you have the hairdresser teach you how to do a blowout at home that will maintain a flowing, shiny, touchable style that lasts all day without fuss.

Get your routine of bathing, cosmetics, dressing, and hair down to no more than an hour and set your alarm to do it. Don’t keep him waiting while you do this, and continue to fuss with it all day. Guys like to look and touch, they are not interested in the process per se. They also don’t care about outlandish streaks and shapes and nonsense in your hair unless that’s his thing and in that case I’m the wrong one to advise you. ( *note to men- respect her need and space to do these things if you want to look at the results.) Even for the most natural, low maintenance gal, it doesn’t happen by itself. Supermodels have teams of technicians. Guys, ask her how much time she needs to get ready, let her know when you expect to depart, and then Stay Out of The Way! A girl needs some privacy to maintain a little mystery.

Maintain your nails, even if it’s at home. Guys don’t like acrylic dragon talons in neon stripes. Keep it simple but clearly looked after. Nails filed to uniform length and clear, french, or a natural polish unless it’s a special occasion. Learn to do this fast at home for yourself. It doesn’t require significant financial investment and time at a salon.

Whiten your teeth at home. Brush, and floss, and carry mints.

Go to a drug or department store and get a lesson in cosmetics that you can do in five minutes. Get them to show you an alternate sexy look for evening.

Get your most honest friend who has a clue about clothes and collect a simple wardrobe of things that are feminine, simple, fit correctly and are flattering to your body type. If you feel good, you will look good.

Throw out all your undergarments and start again. Get fitted for a bra (free service at higher end department stores) and collect matching sets of pretty, flattering panties and bras. Be as daring as you can and still be comfortable also purchasing some special items for fun. I find lacy thongs with flat sides comfortable and do not make panty lines. Keep searching until you find what is comfortable for you and challenge yourself to be sexy. There are adorable boyshorts that will do the trick, too. This is not a one time thing. Commit to take it up a notch underneath everyday. It will affect how you look and feel in your clothes. Do the same with shoes. Don’t give in to the ugly. You can find leg flattering styles that are comfortable. Many wedge and platform heels are sexy and surprisingly comfortable.

Train your posture like a ballerina. Head high, shoulders back, elegant. A genuine smile is the perfect accessory to this. We teach people how to treat us.

Remember, men like to look but don’t want the gory details of beauty or wait around for it to happen. Do it. For you. For him. Because.

Do not smoke. ( Really bad for skin and not attractive). Learn to cook. Drink only in moderation. Find something you enjoy that is physically active, even if it is walking your friend’s dog. Read erotic poetry and learn how to make yourself come. Self confidence is sexy. Read books. Watch films, attend shows and cultural events. Have a life, better yourself, and be interesting to talk to. Be a good listener. Tell the truth. Be nice.

Notice all of the above are about improving yourself, not changing someone else. They appear to be external but have the side effect of creating a mood of confidence and sensuality. Once you are the catch you want to be- you will not be able to keep them away, and you will have the confidence to recognize the man you’ve been waiting for.

21 Comments on “How to be a Good Girl from….a good girl”

  1. sosweet2362 says:

    An excellent post! I think we may need to resurrect sending our girls to charm school.

  2. just visiting says:

    Great post. And a little sunscreen goes a long way lol.

  3. angie says:

    Her advice is good, women should look good, but I see that she has nothing to say on how to have a good personality. Therefore, I think the title of this post should be “Personal Grooming tips” or “How to turn on men”.

    • dannyfrom504 says:

      *sigh* i can’t win, can i? lol.

      • angie says:

        LOL no offense meant danny ๐Ÿ™‚ it was me just stating my opinion, but honestly you have the best blog in the manosphere that i’ve read, i’m so glad to find one that’s not hateful towards women..

    • stormy says:

      1) Listen to your boyfriend/husband/fiance when he’s talking to you.
      2) Don’t give advice unless he asks for it. (every time you treat him like a helpless baby squirrel, you take away his nuts)
      3) Don’t flirt with other men to make him jealous.
      4) Do things for him to surprise him (ie cook his favorite dish or dessert!)
      5) Don’t text/answer calls when you’re doing something together.
      6) Respect his interests.
      7) Don’t nag him excessively.
      8) Snuggle.
      9) “Snuggle.” (euphemism)
      10) Let him spend time with his friends. Don’t hate on his friends.

      We can keep adding to this list.

      • angie says:

        Hmm, good start, but making it into a post would be better ๐Ÿ˜‰

      • This is a good list, but it needs to be elaborated on.

        For instance, in a marriage, you’re going to have give your man advice he doesn’t ask for. That’s part of being in a partnership. Your advice not to give a man advice works only if you’re just dating or are a girlfriend.

        Again, respecting his interests needs elaboration. If his interest is gaming and he games for hours at a time, when he has responsibilities like parenting, he’s going to need to told to cut back.

        Stormy, I can tell by this list you have never been married. ๐Ÿ™‚

      • stormy says:


        I was just doing a basic guide. I’ve nagged my bf before about his crazy sleep cycle and I’ve done stuff like woken him up for an exam. I know there’s definite exceptions. I definitely baby squirrel my bf a bit more than I probably should, but it’s hard to curtail that instinct to care for someone you love. But I’m mostly thinking of nagging girlfriends that are angry all the time, aren’t affectionate or intimate with their boyfriends, and they’re constantly nagging and bitching and trying to control everything they do. There are a good number of those. I don’t understand it.

    • Aโ™  says:


      I disagree.

      I believe she says, quite clearly, “how to have a good personality”:

      I’ve rearranged the suggestions, but the words are all there, in the original

      “[Have] a genuine smile. Find something you enjoy that is physically active, even if it is walking your friendโ€™s dog. Read erotic poetry.. Self confidence is sexy. Read books. Watch films, attend shows and cultural events. Have a life, better yourself, and be interesting to talk to. Be a good listener. Tell the truth. Be nice. We teach people how to treat us.”

      Not a word of it mentions a woman’s appearance (even the suggestion for the smile isn’t about looks).

      Those points are all about behavior – which is the manifestation of personality.

  4. stormy says:

    THIS IS AWESOME. Only other thing I would add is:
    1) eight glasses of water a day. so good for you.
    2) moisturizer with spf

    “Go to a drug or department store and get a lesson in cosmetics that you can do in five minutes. Get them to show you an alternate sexy look for evening.”

    They are so helpful, and they really know what they are talking about. There are also some good youtube tutorials on natural beauty:

    Also, if I start out and feel gross one day, wearing pretty underwear really helps! She’s absolutely right!

  5. This advice is excellent! This advice should especially be taken by older married women, who tend to let themselves go. (Sorry, ladies.) Men don’t want mommies for sex partners, they want sexy well-groomed women.

    It’s okay to post about being attractive on the outside, without mentioning having a winning personality.

  6. […] Danny From 504 – My Reply, How To Be A Good Girl From A Good Girl […]

  7. rgoltn says:

    You just described my wife of 17 years. Hot $tuff is what I call her.

  8. MissMarie says:


  9. Danny,

    And they say your blog is crap? This is the kind of advice women should be hearing everyday. As long as you keep attracting women like ‘Songirl’ to your blog, and even better, get her to dish out advice like this, you have me hooked on you for life ๐Ÿ˜€

    Can you say ‘thanks’ to Songirl for me? She is obviously a great woman. If I am half what she is after 22 years of marriage, I think I would have achieved a lot. I mean that from the bottom of my heart.

    • dannyfrom504 says:

      I can assure you, she’s read your comment and I’ll simply ask her to email you directly.

      Please take this conversation to ST in email land. Apparently….she wants to learn something.

      • Danny,
        Sure, she can always email me. I always of course want to hear from sensible women like her. But all I wanted on this occasion was simply to say a ‘thank you’ to her. If we all followed her advice, there would be a lot of happier women (and of course men) around these days. As opposed to the stressed out suicidal ‘walking dead’ we are all fast becoming.
        Um, did I depress you all?
        (I shall take my chill pill now. Ah, that’s better :-))

    • Songirl says:

      You are lovely Spacetraveller:)

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