You’re Fourth….

I was watching Patrice O’Neal’s first HBO stand up gig. It was 2005. I discovered Patrice via Opie and Anthony back in 1999-2000. What I liked about him was his relationship philosophies. This was WAAAAAAAAAAY before I even could fathom red-pill knowledge. Patrice WAS a red-pill. Had I never found Patrice, I’d probably still be pining over Beth. And as I’ve posted before I crossed paths with her 4 times over an 8 year stretch. It was Patrice’s philosophy of “you’re the fourth most important thing in my life” and Beth’s propensity to sully my #1-3 that eventually made me sever ties with her altogether.

Patrice asked the audience (read: the Ladies in the audience)-

“Let’s say you were in a horrific accident and in order to save you, they had to remove your vagina. What would you then have to offer your man? I’ll wait.” The audience laughed at first and over a 15-20 second period he got 2 responses. Those being: oral and anal.

Read it again, oral and anal.

Patrice mentioned these 2 options and again paused. “You see, you ladies have relegated yourselves to simply holes. Notice not one woman said, ‘learn to play Xbox, get good at chess, learn piano, and learn massage therapy.’ Then he (and the crowd) erupted into laughter.

Back in Japan, I was ready to break up with Nancy. I used to joke with her about her “bringing nothing to the table besides sex” in our relationship. Eventually, I realized how true that was. I withdrew from the relationship into the third month of our dating. By the time were about to hit home port, I was completely avoiding her. Everyone working with me KNEW I wasn’t happy with the relationship. Well, I had learned that one of my co-workers (one of the ladies who I “honk honked het titty meat”), pulled the gf aside and asked about our relationship. When my lovely co-worker hinted that I MIGHT not be all that please with the dynamic the gf said (I SWEAR t God), “why wouldn’t he be happy, he’s getting laid.”

Yeah. Read it again. I’m writing this because there are A LOT of women that truly believe the core of a man’s happiness lies in his “getting the pussy.” Really? That’s like saying my car is important to me because it has 4 tires. SMH. Anytime a woman tries to use sex as leverage as to her “contribution” I always negate it with “Well, I give you cumsies too don’t I? Do you see me make asking for credit?” This is why I posted in “natural game” it’s most important point. If I have a gf she’s the FOURTH most important thing in my life, and I STICK TO THAT. Why you ask….

It’s pure ANTI-PEDESTALIZATION. This equals MAJOR tingles on her end. It exemplifies assertive yet dominant leadership that most (read- good eggs) women find irresistible.

I’ll try and find a clip of Patrice doing this bit.

[edit- i guess i should add some closure as to what ended up going down with the ex gf. i was living in Spain, she was in Japan- she was tipsy and drunk dialed me and admitted “wishing she’d have become Missus504.” *sigh*what i told her STUNNED her. i knew she wouldn’t get it if i told her, so i presented her with a little question.
“Sweetie, is you mom a great wife?” and she quickly answered that she was. i asked her WHAT made her such a great wife and she fired off a list of things she never did in the almost year long relationship we had where i broke up with her then gave her a second chance. a few seconds into her “list” she stopped. and uttered, “oh my God.”

yeah. after that conversation (she cried btw) she quickly went from something “casual” with her bf to being in a serious relationhip and eventually married that man and now she’s a mom. and i’ve NEVER said a bad thing about her. just wasn’t meant to be.]


19 Comments on “You’re Fourth….”

  1. Vicomte says:

    This is the kind of situation that shows just how horrible most women are at introspection. They’ll say things like the above and think they’re demonstrating how base or simple men are, and fail to see what that belief, and the actions that stem from it, makes them.

    This is the same kind of mental blind spot that allows a man to treat a girl like a whore as long as he doesn’t call her one. One is acceptable or even encouraged (dare I say desired), the other is anathema.

    On the other hand, a lot of men, sadly, are just happy to be filling a hole. No one is innocent.

  2. LongLostFriend says:

    Good call on getting the ex-gf to use her mother as a point of reference.

    I am not familiar with the mother-daughter dynamic in this case, of course, but it reminds me how a lot of good wives have failed to instruct their daughters how to be good wives themselves. I have two daughters of my own, and knowing my ex-wife the way I do, I am going to be doing a lot of that direct, clear instruction myself.

  3. Jim says:

    A hole is a hole. What’s the rest got to make me want to keep it around is more important? Men got to realize they are the catch. Especially as they age, play it cool, and let the women chase them.

    • dannyfrom504 says:

      I think both parties form a union that holds importance on each- read…the man AND the woman. But since I’m a man I inherently want to teach guys how to screen women better. You stumble across a shitty woman….walk away. I don’t care how “hot” she is, her education level….just bail.

      • Jim says:

        There’s a meme going around that states ignore women and acquire money (or worth). That is the best advice any young man out there can get. Cause not only do you get to the point that you have options as far as living, you have options galore with women. And when your goal is to live life on your terms, you screen women in order to protect yourself.

        • dannyfrom504 says:

          My life doesn’t revolve around women. It revolves around my best interests. If a woman happens to come into my world and I realize I’m not appreciated, respected, and adored…..

          I’m gone.

    • Jim says:

      Let me add unlike the guy who was too scared to call his wife that he might be 5 minutes late even though he was actually helping me get my car started. That is a life of hell in my book and I’d never allow myself to live like that. Much rather be alone. Too bad that guys like that will probably end up that way and not by choice.

  4. just visiting says:

    It may take some cultural and male influence to convince women that the vagina is not the end all be all. The message that sex trumps all other qualities in a woman stunts them from from developing them. They don’t think that these qualities matter enough to men. It shouldn’t stop them from developing those qualities for their own sake and growth, but male validation is a powerful thing , especially for young women. And feminine nurturing and adoration is slammed by the culture as boring and weak.

    • LongLostFriend says:

      Now that I have been thinking about off and on for most of the day, I would argue that a lot of Blue Pill problems (one-itis, Nice Guy-ism, and so forth) comes from men needing to be convinced of this message as well.

      Men need to expect more and verbally demand more from women other than just putting out. When men commit to women put up with female bullshit solely due to the promise of sex, they are giving up their power. It’s like in the comedy routine above: women largely don’t reject the idea that they need to be more than sexual to be a good partner; rather, it is a concept so foreign to them that they have not even considered it.

      It’s like anything else in life: if we collectively send the message that a certain standard or level of performance is “good enough,” most will rise only to that level of expectation. Men have seen this for at least a generation, and most of us don’t even think it realistic to expect to be treated with respect and kindness. That is what has to change: collectively, men have to set the bar higher.

      • dannyfrom504 says:

        I blog with the hopes of providing an example.

        When I was younger I had more concern for her than myself. Which is wrong, I can care for her. But if I’m not my priority than I’ll make crap decisions.

        I’ve learned by observation and experience, women need a strong foundation in a man. When you provide calm, assertive, yet steady demeanor it has a powerful affect on a woman.

        Maybe it took me a while to get here, but I finally did.

        Sent from my iPhone

  5. […] Danny From 504 – Beta Idle, Beth and My Journey Into Oneitis, You’ve Got To Keep Her On Her Toes, The Girls Are Bringing It,  Alpha Humans, You’re Fourth […]

  6. I’m curious. What were some of these things she listed that her mother did, that she didn’t do?

  7. Spacetraveller says:

    Danny,
    It’s incredible that those women gave those answers to Patrice! Unbelievable…
    This reminds me of Bellita’s post on Steak where she describes Kerry Katona’s reaction to her bf at the time cheating on her. She said ‘why did he go out for hamburger when he had steak at home?’, indicating her big breasts.
    She thought her big breasts were enough to keep him…
    What a shame.
    But somehow, it might be easy to see how women can develop this idea. If as a woman you are repeatedly turned down by men in favour of other women who ‘let it all hang out’ you start to get certain ideas…
    It takes a certain fortitude of character not to fall into that trap.
    And it certainly helps to hear a man say what you say.


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