To the Woe of WomenPosted: September 17, 2012 | |
Since “the week of Mentu’s Yam-Bag” has subsided. It’s really me struck how the women are responding to the subject of men opting out of parenthood, and getting a vasectomy. While I could give 2 shits what women in general think of my decision to get the procedure done, there is one person who’s opinion somewhat matters to me.
Now, before Mentu posted I had thought about getting the procedure done. I was about 27-28, and I was actually the assistant to the Dr. who was performing Vas’ (we pronounce them Vas’s in the medical community) and asked my Medical Officer about getting it done. I was told the Command wouldn’t approve it since I had no children and I was so young.
Well guess what? I’m 1 ½ years shy of the big Four-Oh.
One of my friends is a Urology Tech (aka meat-gazing HM) and I plan on going over to speak with him about getting the procedure done. Funny thing is he’s the ONLY MALE uro-tech. lol. Seriously. I know 2 of the Urologists, so I’m hoping I can speak with them as well to find out a bit more about the side effects.
Now I KNOW I’d make a decent father. I’ve been asked numerous times, while checking in someone’s kid for an appointment, “So, how many kids do you have?” Honestly, I’ve been asked that too many times to count. They’re always surprised when I tell them I don’t have any, and that I really don’t think I want kids. I’ve heard damn near every rationalization as to why that’s going to change and how important it is for me to have kids. But guess what….
The only people who have been cool about me telling them my reasons for why I don’t want kids has been….FATHERS. Yup. Of course they’d NEVER say that around their wives. It’s always while within the safety of men. And I admit, my reasons are VERY selfish.
I don’t think I have the patience to spend the next 20 years raising a living thing that requires THAT much work (a dog is just fine though). I like my spontaneity, I like knowing I can pick up my shit and head out the door at any given moment, I like the peace and tranquility of my monastic existence, but most importantly.
It’s too big a risk.
My first priority has ALWAYS been to take care of myself. I’ve seen too many cases (not read about- HEARD FROM THE MOUTHS OF FATHERS) about the absolute crushing experiences they’ve experienced during a divorce, and/or has only been able to see his child MAYBE once a month, if that. Some become so chastised by their ex’s that the kids eventually believe dad really is the demon mom has made him out to be. It’s just not something I’m willing to risk. I’ve worked too hard to get to where I am now, to have everything I’ve worked for taken.
Not I said Dan.
Most women debate with about the joys of fatherhood blah, blah, blah. Fuck that shit. I don’t feel I’m missing out on anything. I don’t feel my life is lacking in any way. I don’t feel this deep need and desire to sire children; at least not in the country’s current state. I feel bad for women though, however THEY made it the way it is. I have a suggestion for you ladies. Next time you hear a woman brag about how she totally got over on baby-daddy….give her a good talking to. But I don’t expect that happen. Not when Oprah and MSM praises women for ruining a man’s life.
I’m guessing as more and more men wake up, more and more will opt out of parenting. I talked to my mother about my looking to get the snip, and obviously she was upset. I’m her eldest and her only Son. But you know what’s funny? She told me this, or something along these lines.
“I’m pretty disappointed in your decision. You’d make an amazing husband, and even better father. But, I respect your decision. I can completely understand why you are so worried about having a child. It’s really sad that the system is so one sided that the only thing you can do is to not become a father.”
Interestingly, while the vasectomy talks were circulating last week, one of my readers Jacquie commented that it’s the same men having vas’ are the very men that NEED to become fathers. If you have a daughter, you want to have an honest talk with her about her REAL chances at landing a quality man to have kids with.
When I talk to women about this shit, they always tell me that I could end up partners with a woman that had 2-3 kids.
NO. HELL. FUCKING. NO.
The MINUTE I know I’m talking to a single mother of 2-3 kids the first thing I do is be upfront and inform them that I am NOT seeking a LTR with a woman with 2 or more kids. One male blogger actually asked me if REALLY tell women that and I told him DAMN RIGHT I do. They’re usually cool about it at first. But eventually, I need to leave because it’s obvious it bothers her when I keep refusing to LTR them. I don’t want the baby daddy drama, and I ESPECIALLY do not want to raise a kid that’s not mine. I DO NOT intend on spending my resources on someone else’s kid. The look on women’s faces when they realize I’m serious, and reiterate my reasons the look of despair and disappointment is telling. When I reiterate that more and more men are opting out, they seem shocked. Is this selfish of me?
I could give a fuck.
As bad as I feel for my mom being disappointed, I feel even MORE sorry for the legions of men that have been raped by the family court system. I’m not 100% on my not having kids or getting the procedure done. TBH I could never consider kids unless I were with a woman that I could see as a SERIOUS prospective LTR. Well, guess what- I don’t see that happening in the next 2-3 years. My priority is my retirement, not a gf. And considering I’ll be 40 when I retire….
I think if it were in the cards for me, it would have already happened. Oh well. I always have Brody.
I’ve even been accused of the decision to remain childless as a protest against women, that I’m bitter towards women. I’ve given up elaborating on my reasonings with women. When they call me bitter, I simply reply, “Ok, yup. That’s it.” From then , the discussion is over. If she attempts to keep me talking, i just tell her I’m done speaking with her on the matter. But I do have to say-