The Psycho ExGirlfriendPosted: September 28, 2012
i was talking with a reader who was telling me his woes and transgressions from an ex that’s nuts. he’s never posted but he asked me a question in email land. and i can tell you, girl fucking RUINED this dude’s life. we’ve all been there. i had mine. you find yourself dating this SLAMMING hot girl, things are great. she fucks like a porn star, is ALWAYS down to initiate, you suddenly start telling yourself, “damn, i really fucking hit pay dirt.”
then it happens. call after call after call. “where are you, why haven’t you called me back”
“you’re spending way too much time with your friends!”
slowly but surely she starts encroaching herself more and more into your life. she starts getting WAAAAAAAY to clingy. she begins accusing you of seeing other girls. you start to withdraw from the relationship. the shit get messier, then you realize.
She’s bat-shit fucking crazy.
you tell her (politely, calmly) that you think it’s best if the 2 of you quit seeing each other.
we know the drill. the phone calls, the texts, she might even stalk you. she shit talks you to everyone. sigh. if you only have ONE psycho-ex, you know PRECISELY what i’m talking about. Psycho chicks all share common traits. the 2 main being.
1. they’re FUCKING BEAUTIFUL
2. they fuck phenomenally.
if you’re a man that’s relatively successful with women, we talk about psycho ex’s like war stories, usually over a beer. the following video is a series of call that a guy posted to make his ex stop calling. i get douche chills listening to them. this originally came out around 1999-2000. proceed at your own risk. and please note the time between call. there are actually 63 call. i know because i have them on iTunes.
5 and 6 are the most telling. she’s DESPERATE. she innocently asks for his help with something. and the with 7th- WOW.
i can now tell fairly quickly if i’m dealing with a possible psycho. she’s very pretty, she’s PERFECT- at first. the sex is super-fantastic. but….you MUST dig beneath the surface. you MUST be a detective. but you have to be subtle. you must find out her relationship status with her dad. if she talks shit about her dad. YOU MENTION YOUR DAD’S AN ASSHOLE AS WELL. let her go on and on and on. listen to every word she says. then find out why she broke up with her last bf. it’s unlikely she’ll tell you she was dumped. the more shit she talks about him, the crazier she is.
PUNCH OUT MAVERICK!!!!!
obviously the longer you’re with her, the longer it’ll take to end it. quadruple the normal break up time. honestly, the SECOND i have sex with a girl, i go on high alert to look for psycho traits. and utilize the above quals. having a pyscho is almost a rite of passage. lol. so grab a beer, kick back and listen to 53 rambling, nut-case voice mails, and count your lucky fucking stars.
this reminded me of this song. lol.