Neighborhood Fun and a “What the hell” Moment.Posted: November 21, 2012 | |
Was talking to one of the neighborhood wives the other night. She just moved to the neighborhood. I was introduced as “the guy to keep your kids from”. Lol. It’s kind of the joke of the street. She asked confusedly if I were some kind of sex offender. One of the dad’s joked, “Boy I’ll say, that kids so good with women it should be a crime.” Then they mentioned the fact that I have guns, and it’s probably not safe to have kids around my house.
Then she asked if I had ever been married or if I had kids. When I informed her that I hadn’t she looked at me like I had 3 heads. “Don’t you plan on ever getting married?” she asked. Oh, this woman is 30 btw and has been married for 6-7 years. She has a 2 year old daughter. Cute kid too. So I started on my red pill ideology on how marriage just isn’t a good option for men these days unless they KNOW that want to be a father. And since I really didn’t plan on having kids, there was no point in getting married. Then she mentioned companionship and I told her I have Brody, my 6 year old English Staffordshire Terrier. She said a dog just can’t compare to the companionship of a woman.
Epic set up, we haez it.
“You’re right, Brody won’t leave me and take half my shit.”
“Danny, you jerk, I’m talking about you know….sex.” That’s when everyone laughed. One of the dad’s chimed in, “Are you kidding, if you have a daughter, and she’s over 18…keep her away from Danny. He’s GREAT with women.” She looked at me puzzled and I raised my eye-brows quickly and said, “Getting laid’s easy. VERY easy.”
Then they mentioned the single mom I was getting booty calls from when I first moved out here. “Seriously, that woman was smoking.” Ok. When I first moved out here I was walking Brody and saw this very cute brunette unloading her kids from her car. We made eye contact and smiled at each other. Then a few weeks later I saw her drive her past me as I was walking Brody and she smiled and waved. In response, I pointed at my eye, pointed at my heart, then pointed at her. I saw her cover her mouth and laugh.
One day, I said….”what the hell?”
As I walked Brody past her house, I walked to the door, rang the bell, and when she answered I said, “Brody said he wanted to meet you, so here he is.” She kneeled down and started petting Brody and commented how adorable he is. Then she asked for my name. We introduced ourselves and I learned she had recently divorced and she was in the process of selling the house (which she won in the divorce). She had been married 5 years and had 2 kids. Joint custody. I told her we should exchange numbers to get together sometime.
Now, I was working nights back then. Every other weekend I was off. One night I texted her what she had planned that evening. She didn’t have kids. I recommended me stopping by to watch a movie. She agreed and I brought over a bottle of wine. I’m pretty sure you can guess where this is going.
Over the next year, I’d get a text around 8-9 asking me to come over “in about an hour.” Either the kids were asleep, or she didn’t have the kids. I was PISSED when she finally sold the house. There was NEVER a single conversation about a relationship. I was just a booty call. Then I told the new neighbor, “I can’t wait to run into the Asian jogger chick.” Lol. ALL the guys on my street know who I’m talking about. My next door neighbor’s wife said, “And Danny is GREAT with kids. My boys love him and my daughter has such a crush on him.” Her hubby nodded, “Oh yeah.” When the new neighbor asked if I ever wanted children I told her I really didn’t think so. But I’m fine not having kids. Then she asked me if I ever wanted to pass on my legacy. I laughed.
“Who the hell am I- King Arthur?” lol.
Later on, one of the guys told me, “You know EVERYTIME you give that diatribe I KNOW my wife’s gonna bring it up when we get home if I believe any of what you say.” lol.
fucking Dittohead bitches.