Deti Speaks. You Listen

We all know Deti, unless you’re new to the Sphere. As the unofficial “gatekeeper” of the Sphere, I’m happy and proud to admit I’m the ONLY person that knows Deti IRL. And yes, we’ve all told Deti to start a blog, but he’s said it’s not really his style. But I’ve dubbed him my official guest-poster. When the all wise Deti gets on a roll, he slings some major heat. Well, the lovely Stingray was brave enough to start an open forum where women could ask questions they may have about the “Sphere”. The first question was a woman asking, “why are men so mad?” All I could think was “OH BOY. THIS is gonna be good”. THANK GOD, that question was asked on a freindly site. I recall a female who posts here asking for relationship advice on Roissy’s site. Insert sound of train-wreck….here. lol.

His intial response to a female commenter was-

“The men who post here were systematically raised, educated, brought up and socialized in a feminine-centric worldview. When we questioned it, we were drugged, sent to counseling, academically disciplined, grounded, administered corporal punishment, sent to required sensitivity training, or fired.

We watched our mothers run roughshod over, mistreat, abuse, bankrupt, and undermine our fathers. And those are the ones lucky enough (like me) to grow up with our fathers living with us. Those less fortunate were deprived of meaningful relationships with their fathers; or denied a relationship altogether.

We listened to a daily pounding and pummeling of messages from absolutely everyone around us telling us that:

1. Our sexual desires were ignoble, base, dirty, predatory, evil and bad.
2. We did not mature as quickly as girls and that girls are just better at nurturing and caring.
3. Without the civilizing influence of women, we are violent, predatory, shiftless, lazy, irresponsible, incompetent and unfaithful.
4. We are sexist male chauvinist pigs bent on violently beating women to within an inch of their lives, depriving them of basic life necessities, and demanding they be kept barefoot and pregnant, chained to a kitchen stove.
5. If we are married or are fathers, we are the stupid, unthinking parent and we need the wife to be smart and sensible. She will always save our bacon and clean up all our mistakes.
6. If we are single men, we must be beer swilling, porn addicted, video-game playing fatsos living in our mothers’ basements.
7. If we are men attending church, it is our God-commanded DUTY to wife up a former carousel rider who’s just returned to church at age 30 after her shack up with F*ckbuddy Rockbanddrummer busted up, her abortion, her stint in drug rehab, and her bastard 4 year old in tow.”

Then adds-

“Then we’re told by some female bloggers that, well, you guys had the facts right in front of you. You could see the alpha douchebags were getting all the girls. You could see the bad boys and the jerks getting all the sex. Why didn’t you figure it out? Why didn’t you ask those guys what they were doing right? Why didn’t you figure out your parents, pastors, teachers and Scout leaders were wrong? Why didn’t you think for yourselves? Why don’t you take responsibility for your own lives? It’s all YOUR fault, you beta/omega men. You should have learned. You should have figured it out. You should have defied your parents and pastors, and told them to go f*ck themselves. You should have hung out with the bad boys and jerks and douchebags so you could learn.

Then we’re told by feminists that “nice guys” aren’t really nice. No, they’re “Niceguys”, meaning that the “nice” part is an act. They are “nice” and therefore they expect sex as a reward for being “nice”. Those feminists say that “niceguys” are creepy and mentally disturbed and potential rapists. And, well, if you want to get a girl, you just need to “be more attractive” and the “onus is on men to not be creepy”.

Then a dude linked a post about- “what boys hear growing up”. Deti commented-

“The laws and culture are hopelessly slanted against men and in favor of women. Divorce and family law are crushingly draconian. Men are routinely put under incredibly onerous financial obligations including alimony and child support. An unhappy wife can blow up a family and take a man’s children away from him for no cause at all, or simply because she no longer wants to be married, or no longer is “in love with” him. Stories abound of wives keeping the kids and the marital home, moving the new boyfriend in, while the ex husband moves into a studio apartment and must pay her mortgage, all while his ex wife shtups the new boyfriend in a house he pays for in a bed he bought. Child visitation orders are routinely not enforced. Men are incarcerated for failing to pay child support– even when they are unemployed or laid off. A woman can have her husband slapped with a preliminary injunction or no-contact order or have him arrested and removed from the home merely by calling police and telling them “I feel unsafe”.

There are stories of women cuckolding their husbands, i.e. having extramarital sexual affairs and getting pregnant by another man, then passing off the child as her husband’s to cover the affair. When the husband later discovers the truth in the divorce, the soon to be ex husband finds he must still pay child support for a child who is not his. His wife lied through her teeth to her own husband about the child’s parentage, yet walks away from the marriage with cash and prizes.

Sexual harassment law in the US is a farce. Men walk on pins and needles, deathly afraid they will say or do something that some ultrasensitive woman will take offense to. Whether what they say or do is objectively offensive doesn’t matter–all that matters is whether even ONE WOMAN got offended. Sexual harassment is essentially (1) masculine conduct by unattractive men; or (2) any conduct by anyone that any woman does not like. Looking at a woman is sexual harassment. Refusing to help a woman lift or move something heavy is sexual harassment. Commenting in any way, shape, manner or form on anyone’s appearance is sexual harassment. Commenting about some TV show is sexual harassment. Excluding women from male conversation is sexual harassment. It’s completely and totally ridiculous. Radical feminists are trying to expand this to the world at large. There are serious proposals to outlaw men looking at women for too long — such that a woman can summon police merely because some guy on the street looked at her. JUST FOR LOOKING AT HER.”

Deti Game. BRILLIANT. Couldn’t have said it any better. And he did all the heavy lifting on this post. WINSAUCE.

“@ Paul:

‘What are the basics of game? What should I generally be doing to attract more women?’

My opinions, FWIW:

1. Frame. Your frame, first, last, always. Make her step into your frame; you don’t step into hers.

2. Confidence and dominance.

3. Have a plan, a life mission. You’re going to do something with your life: A job, a career, a vocation. The prime purpose of that “something” is yours and yours alone. Its purpose — and your life purpose — is not primarily to provide money, resources and a house for a woman and children (although a woman and children, if you want them, will be the benefactors of your “something” which you build and acquire for yourself).

4. Have a good thorough understanding of female hypergamy. It is the deep rooted, hardwired desire of a woman to have for herself the best man she can get. This desire cannot be removed from, counseled out of, or socialized out of a woman; nor can she do anything about it. The only thing that quiets hypergamy is satisfying it. It always runs in a woman as a background “operating program”, to use a computing metaphor. Whenever a woman breaks up with you, essentially she is saying to you “I think I can do better than you”.

5. Understand that nearly every woman has three basic directives which operate in this order:
a. Prime directive: Secure sperm from the highest quality man she can get, get pregnant, and have strong healthy babies.
b. Secondary directive: Secure resources to provide for herself and her babies.
c. Tertiary directive (operates only if directives 1 and 2 fail): Secure resources to provide for herself by any means necessary.

6. Be the high quality man. Live your life. Don’t tolerate her taking over your life or making increasing demands on you and your time. You bring her into your life; you don’t step into hers. Make her qualify herself to you; you don’t qualify yourself to her. Make her demonstrate that she is worth what she’s asking for from you. Never ever invest time, money or resources before she shows she is worthy of them.

“What are the basics of anti-game? What is woman-repellent?”

1. Offering commitment before she shows she’s worthy of it. Such a man is to women as a slut is to a man: Easy. Worthless. Good enough to milk for all he’s worth; not good enough for an LTR or marriage.

2. Pedestalization. Worshiping her.

3. Supplication. Giving her whatever she wants hopefully in exchange for sexual favors. Bargaining with her for sex or other things. Placating her with gifts or nights out. Saying “Whatever you want to think/do/say/be, dear.”

4. Emotional displays. Don’t be too happy, sad, mad, elated, angry or giddy. Don’t show a lot of emotion. And under no circumstances should you ever, ever, display fear. You’ll feel fear. But you cannot show HER you feel it. Ever.

5. Submissiveness: letting her make all the decisions, letting her determine the course of your relationship.

6. Timidity, hesitancy, lack of resolve and will. Hesitating to make known your wants, needs and desires. Failing to stand up for yourself in the relationship. Failing to say “no” when required; fearing the consequences of her emotions or reactions; failing to act boldly.”

Class Dismissed. and i hate this using caps and shit.

Stay Up.


20 Comments on “Deti Speaks. You Listen”

  1. Stingray says:

    Heh. I intentionally asked Deti to come help answer questions on that post. He’s so very good at it.

  2. Vicomte says:

    I’m suddenly imagining what it must be like to only know one person IRL.

    And for that one person to be Danny.

  3. Vicomte says:

    Back off hussy.

    He’s MINE.

    And, er, Deti’s…

    and blaines

    and that taco slut and the guy from the gay bar

    and…fuck it have him then

  4. […] Deti Speaks. You Listen […]

  5. earl says:

    “why are men so mad?”

    I love that was the first question. Throwing meat into the lion’s den.

    I was more mad when I had no clue about women and tried the nice guy route. Now my toes are tapping.

  6. OffTheCuff says:

    The anti-game stuff, and the clucking from the ladybloggers just nailed it. I think the latter bloggers fail to empathize just how hard it is for a born and bred rule-follower to become a rulebreaker.

  7. […] The end of paternal investment. Related: For men, it gets better. Related: Danny pulls out some good comments by deti. Related: The original […]

  8. Your son or daughter doesn’t just need a role model, he or she needs YOU. You will have an impact on your child’s life – make it a positive impact. Nurture and support your child as much as you can.

  9. The Scolds' Bridle says:

    Deti does have a blog.

    It’s just not centralized. It’s scattered all over the manoshpere. Think spread-spectrum encoding.


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