Beta’s on the Serengeti: II

friday night i stopped into the local. i was minding my own, sipping my beer and watching sports center. two women came in and asked for change (don’t recall why exactly they needed change tbh) but Ritchie said he couldn’t give them change unless they made a purchase.

well no sooner than being turned down and about to walk away (and they completely understood and didn’t argue with Ritchie) did the guy next to me chime in, “how much do you need, i can help.”

the whole interaction was a “meh” issue to me until dude stepped in; that’s when the douche chills kicked in.

the girls (very politely) turned him down….THREE times.

the whole point of this post is that i see this shit everyday. i realize guy was trying to help the young ladies, but dear God. he bent over backwards for 2 girls he’d never met for an issue that was such a non-issue.

i see this all the time now. before blogging it wouldn’t even register on my radar. now it screams in my face each time i see it. as a southern man, i’m all about politeness and being accommodating. but there’s a line in the sand; a virtual “don’t go there without risking beta-itis” line.

that line is crossed when you’re acting in a manner to simply gain favor with a women and is not a selfless act. When you act simply to impress a woman, no beuno. that’s the difference. betas act in a manner to curry favor in hopes he’ll get a compliment. an alpha helps out and has ZERO agenda. he isn’t concerned with making her happy. he’s just being a decent person.

Much credit to the women. They didn’t make an issue out of it. They simply didn’t take up dude. It’s VERY common for me to see women jump at the chance to get over on a guy.

Being nice is fine, but don’t go overboard.

Stay up.

29 Comments on “Beta’s on the Serengeti: II”

  1. Socialkenny says:

    Apart from the Beta activities, I’m curious as to why the girls did turn the guy down. Sure I don’t think they sensed that he was proactively being a disingenuous kiss-ass. I’m curious.

  2. BTW Danny, did you have an urge to want to help these HB’s make change? And if you did, I can bet it wasn’t in expectation of getting something?

  3. Vicomte says:

    I’m with Kenny. Dude must have been really bad.

    As far as favors, go, making change is about as minor as it gets. It’s right up there with the guy behind you in line that donates a penny to keep the line moving.

    • Socialkenny says:

      Lol good analogy 🙂

      • Young Hunter says:

        I agree with this line of thought. If I overheard and had the cash to make change I would help someone out. Of course my motive would be different in that I would have none, and no hoops.

    • Vicomte says:

      You expect the dance, obviously.

      ‘I got it. How much do you need?’

      ‘I’m all set, really’

      ‘It’s not a problem. How much?’

      ‘Twenty, Thanks so much.’

      The dick move is to put your wallet back in your pocket after the quasi-refusal and watch their face drop.

      • CLG says:

        yeah but the super creepy stalker beta move would be to write your phone number on each of the bills you give them.

  4. MissMarie says:

    When it’s overeager and I can feel that ‘tone’ I always decline too. It gives off the ‘creepy’ vibe, as in, “If I let this guy help me I can tell he’s going to want something in return.” It’s usually easy to determine genuine from try-hard.

  5. Vicomte says:

    Or you could go really big and turn it around:

    ‘I’ve got change.’

    ‘Oh, no, I couldn’t…’

    ‘Get fucked, then.’


  6. Fred Flange, now with menthol says:

    Shit! That guy was the astral projection of my younger worthless dweeb white-knight orbiter self. I thought he’d been bumped off when Ashton Kutcher stomped on that butterfly in Reality #2.
    I hate when that happens.

  7. ARoss says:

    I use to be really bad with paying for things for others, I’d give out money left right and center to anyone I was friends with as I figured since I have cerebral palsy that I had to go the extra mile to prove myself to others.

  8. earl says:

    “an alpha helps out and has ZERO agenda.”

    Possibly…I’d like to think he’s teaching himself a lesson and by extension those that need his help.

    I’ve had girls ask me for help before when they were in a legitimate bind…and it was a great way to demonstrate to them masculinity. But only if they ask…I don’t give it away for free.

    • dannyfrom504 says:

      Again, I’m a southern man. This shit is second nature to me. Dude jumped out of his chair for these girls.

      • earl says:

        Well I’m a sort of southerner who lives in a northern state. They are so vanilla here the things I do seem crazy to them.

        They help others to get compliments…I help others to learn something about myself.

      • CLG says:

        I can tell you I am guilty of this sort of shit, save if I am driving. To me, helping a woman/old man/child break a 20 at the bar for the jukebox is a non issue (kids need whiskey too), like letting the old woman with 1 thing in front of me in the checkout line at Publix. I dont see the cosmic flirt in that interaction, just a slight banking of good Karma for when I drive like a new yorker NYC taxi drivers are scared of in the land of sweet tea and prudish christian girls. The only way I will help make change with a girl at the bar and think more of it is if all she is wearing is a g-string stuffed with cash and she can shake her ass like this:

  9. […] Beta’s on the Serengeti: II […]

  10. The Ringmistress says:

    I had the good fortune to marry a Southern man. The first thing I noticed was that courtesy was just something he did without thinking.

    And he had a friend who tried to imitate it, but it always came off as false and creepy because it was always a tactic to get something.

    I’d love to see chivalry come back if it meant more men like my husband who live by a code of honor. If it means more betas trying to buy sex with false gallantry, I’ll take the barbarism of this age, thankyouverymuch.

  11. I’d love to see chivalry come back if it meant more men like my husband who live by a code of honor. If it means more betas trying to buy sex with false gallantry, I’ll take the barbarism of this age, thankyouverymuch.

    Hm, yea, don’t worry, you’ll get your barbarism age in spades.

    I’m guessing it went something like this

    Guy: You need some change? I can help.

    Girls: No thanks.

    Guy: You sure, it’s really no problem?

    Girls: Nah, we’re all good, thanks.

    Guy: Well, last chance, you need the change or not?

    Girls: Nope, sorry, creepy ass!

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