The Swan

i have 2 sisters. one i refer to as “little sis”, and the other “baby sis”. i’m the oldest of the siblings. little sis is a few years behind me and baby sis is in her early 20’s. the both of them are VERY different women.

little sis was your typical entitled teen girl in regards to boys. i learned a lot from her. she’s quite beautiful and she was never short on male attention. but, growing up watching the big-brother slaying young girls, she stayed off the carousel. by the time she was married, i think she had an N count of 3. no relationship- no booty. at least thats how i understood it.

she taught me by how she treated her bf’s. they would fawn all over her and she’d be a complete ass to them. then, they’d apoligize for upsetting her. *sigh* what she taught me, or rather, what her BF’s taught me about interacting with women amounted to- whatever they did, do the opposite. i once had the same shit test thrown at me that i’d watched my 17 year old sister pull on a dude. well, i called her out on it.

and it worked. i called her out, she held the frame, then i told her, “i don’t have time for this shit.” and walked away. i’m sure you know how the story ends- she changed her attitude, and we went back to watching tv at her apartment.

little sis is now married- kids, house in suburbia; so she’s good.

baby sis is a whole other animal. from the day she got home from the hospital, i raised her. if i weren’t out skating, i was holding and playing with her. to this day she remembers the “jaws” game. well, baby sis is VERY different from little sis. in a nutshell-

she’s a nerd.

well, she was a nerd. as a girl, she went to a very clique’ish school. and she wasn’t into sports and boys, and the “pop culture” type crap that most grade schoolers were into. she didn’t fit in, and the “cool” girls made sure she knew it. she was the type that would rather retire to her room and play some marios bros. game than venture into the social sphere. by the time she made it to high school, my baby sis made being invisible socially an art. all she wanted was to do her work and not be bothered.

in high school, she opened up a little, made a few friends, and became a TAD more social. but….she was for the most part a loveable nerd girl. she was more artsy- she played piano, she read anime, she LOVED japanese culture. yeah…..she was THAT girl. matter of fact, i think she still has my naruto and voltron dvd’s.

just like all kids, she found her voice. she grew up. now, the akward, clumsy, uncertain girl is a reserved, polite, feminine, demure young woman. and….she’s quite pretty. she has her own style and doesn’t apoligize for it. take it or leave it. well, her job requires her to give presentations and make sales pitches to various eateries in NO. my mom will run into one of her clients while they’re out having lunch and the person (usually a guy) will compliment my mom on how well mannered and pretty baby sis is.

this blow’s baby sis’s mind. she really has no clue she has the amount of physical beauty she does. she even told my mom, “why do people tell me that all the time?” my mom has to explain, “well, beacsue you ARE a good looking woman.”

this.

this is the point of this post.

i learned some time ago how to vet a geniunely nice woman from a narcassitic entitlement princess. now, if you’re only out for a bang, this is irrelevent….go for the +1. but if you’re looking for a RELATIONSHIP with a good woman, ask her this early on in the “getting to know her” phase.

“so, how uncomfortable did it make you with guys complimenting you on your looks.”

if she begins a tirade about not being appreciated for her personality, and guys wouldn’t get past her looks, and she says so with a genuine “bitchy” attitude- RUN. but, if she seems uncomfortable and mentions she never really had much attention from guys, more than likely this girl will make a good long term partner. every woman that i’ve KNOWN was a good woman usually has this characteristic in common. of course, the nuerosis could swing to the extreme in either direction and disqualify her, but usually this is a good measure of a quality woman.

simple humilty via not growing up with every beta fawning over how preeeeeeeeteeee she was. she’s typically a cool girl because she’s HAD to become one. she never had looks as a crutch. i’ve already posted this picture so i’ll repost it. this is the baby sis.

you want a good one, look for one that’s just come into her beauty and learning to get comfortable with it. they’re the coolest women out there.

when she's not tearing out finger nails or churning butter- she's a pastry chef at a famous bakery. baby sis.

when she’s not tearing out finger nails or churning butter- she’s a pastry chef at a famous bakery. baby sis.

stay up


29 Comments on “The Swan”

  1. sway says:

    Great vetting question. I’m definitely going to use that. Thank you sir.

  2. Matt says:

    I think I’m in love with your baby sister.

    By the way, you don’t read anime, you read manga and watch anime.

    If you haven’t seen it, please go watch “Princess Jellyfish”, it gets into geek/nerd/otaku culture in a positive, but very accurate way. Your sister would probably like it as well.

    How’s her markemanship?

  3. Modern Drummer says:

    So true, I love nerdy chicks.

  4. aneroidocean says:

    Very cute. Would date, except for the crazy eyes she’s giving…

  5. Like a G-6 says:

    She’s pretty, and she can cook?

    I’d bag her up quick!

  6. Sort of like ugly duck syndrome. Dated a couple girls who didn’t grow out of the awkward teen years (braces, a bit of baby fat, acne) until the very end of high school, but were now exceptionally pretty. They were both winners who would have made genuinely good relationship partners. Spot on man!

  7. Mark From 423 says:

    You nailed it. Late bloomers rule. Several years ago, a friend and I came up with the concept of “the intangible.” Merely trying to define it is an exercise in futility. But you know it when you encounter a woman who has it. That indefinable but powerful “something” that draws you in. It is seldom found in truly stunning women. (There are some notable exceptions.) It is always never found in “pretty girls” who have been fawned over for their entire lives. But those late-blooming swans often have it in abundance. They developed their intellects and inward confidence while they were in their duckling phase… and retained their humility once they swanned up.

  8. Random Angeleno says:

    easy on the eyes. easy on the personality. me, I’m way too far out of her league, but I’d tell relationship-minded young men they could do a lot worse than her.

  9. aneroidocean says:

    Danny, kind of off topic, but do you pretty much across the board recommend not dating a girl in the military?

  10. Digging this post. There isn’t a substitute for good character and good character often comes from some pretty negative experiences. It doesn’t always come from having the whole world handed to you, surprise surprise.

    A lot of these girls do sometimes lack a little in the “dress up” department. And a little make-over takes them from “okay” to “oh so gorgeous.” I know one I work with, just started dating a guy, some of her FB pics “post-makeover” are damn incredible, but on a daily basis, she’s just okay.

    But nothing that isn’t easily improvable, and I find most of these girls like playing dress-up, especially when they know how to do it. Dress-up in more ways than one, lol. Plus side, they don’t NEED to do it, so they don’t break the bank on clothes and make-up

  11. Tuesday says:

    So hi….I’m Danny’s “baby sis”. Just commenting to say A) Thank you, Danny, I’m flattered you posted about me. B) I’m ALSO flattered people see that pic and still say they think I’m pretty. Seriously. I was giving a psycho face because I was dealing with a very high volume of king cakes, and needed to get my hands back in some icing. xD

    Also…”was” a nerd? I usually hide it well in public (mainly business settings…), but here’s a recent pic of me that says otherwise:

    Glad to see the blog is doing well, btw. …And I’m not just saying that because there’s a post about me on it with 20+ comments. ….That would be awful of me. >.> But seriously. Good luck in all your endeavors, and stay sane. ..love…….you. >.<

  12. elizabeth p. says:

    Needles to say I’m the mother of these 2. I’m so very proud of both of them and also my middle girl. As I always say , it is your differences that make you special. Love ya’ll

  13. […] sis called me the other day and we talked about her post she was very flattered that i wrote about her and she she even […]


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