I Know it’s Over

“Danny, did you have a girl over this weekend?”

K was over. she reads the site sometimes. i must have made mention of a friend having stopped by. i told her i had in fact had a friend over. then she asked if it were a girl. i told her it was in fact a girl. she asked if she could ask me a question and would i be honest in answering. i looked at her for a second. i warned her the contents of this conversation was going to be blogged. then i told her-

“you better be careful that you REALLY want the question to be answered. you know i’m not going to lie to you.”

she asked me directly if i saw other girls. i immediately told her, “yes.” she asked who and i told her that was none of her business. she said she deserved to know. i reminded her that she was NOT my girlfriend and that from the beginning i told her that this was just what this was going to be.

“you do realize i’m moving out of my house this friday?” she looked at me and asked why i was JUST telling her this. i told her, “i just found out to today. when it comes to you, i don’t deal with possibilities, i deal in terms of definitiveness. i told you in april i was going back to NO for good.”

i think this was the moment it hit home for her. suddenly a girl coming over wasn’t the issue. i’m not here to talk shit, or gloat. kerri is a great girl. if i weren’t leaving, things would be different. she looked visibly upset. i think she may be falling for me. this all started in november. i see her once or twice a month.

every woman i’ve gotten involved with where it started to get serious. girl falls for me. it’s almost curse. i told her none of this is about her. i told her she was a phenomenal girl, and that i was in fact filled with regret that it was over. but this was my life, i chose it. every 2-3 years i move on.

“Kerri. you’re a beautiful girl, you won’t be off the market that long and hopefully i treated you in a manner that you realize you deserve to be treated.” despite what you might read here, i’m actually a GREAT guy to be involved with. i treat my women QUITE well. i smiled at her and said, “but no one’s gonna pound that pussy better then me, and you know that. i get in there better than a sybian.”

she bit her lip, smiled, shook her head, and looked away. “what is it with you guys and your dicks? you guys are so bad about opening up.” i looked at her, smiled, and said, “thats EXACTLY what i was talking about. ‘opening YOU up’.”

“Kerri, i think i was VERY clear in telling you how i’m not happy, but this is my life. it’s been my life for the last 20 years. but i am happy to know that YOU are the last girl the navy will take from me.”

she tried to shit-test me with, “now you have a reason to visit jax.” i laughed and told her i’m NEVER coming back to jacksonville, but she’s welcome to visit me in NO, IF i’m single of course.

she asked me if i ever planned on “settling down.” i laughed; i’ve heard this from HUNDREDS of women. i told her i was settled now, that i don’t lead some life of pomp and grandeur. she said she was talking about settling with a woman and getting married. i didn’t EVEN want to have that talk.

i walked up to her, took her hand, placed my palm on her face, and kissed her. then i said, “right now, THIS is enough. besides, you know your brown eyes are my blue skies” she blushed. she asked me how many women i’d told that to, i smirked and replied, “hundreds.” she punch my shoulder.

after i kissed her, i told her i was sorry. she asked what i was sorry about and i told her the last thing i wanted to do was break her heart. she asked how i could be sure her heart were broken. i stared right into her eyes and 2 seconds later she looked away a made a grimacing face. again, i told her i was sorry.

like i said, she’s a great girl, but i’ve been here before. it’s hard for me to really “let her in” when i know ultimately it’s doomed from the start. she never asked about the other girl. i think she already knew. this is why i tell guys to NEVER lie if they’re going to run more than one girl. ALWAYS make it known from the beginning she is NOT your girlfriend.

i was VERY clear with Kerri that i was leaving and we weren’t going to be exclusive, that id she met someone that she wanted to “boyfriend up” with, i would let her go. but her hamster told her SHE could win me over despite my ADMITTING this has happened to me before. but she’s a woman- emotion trumps logic and reason.

i think the fact that she NEVER mentioned the other girl again is pretty telling.

when you’re honest, you have a better chance of “hoe’ing it up” as a female i work with puts it. lol. she affectionately call me “hoe ass”. lol. i tell her, “i’m not a hoe, just a man with options.”

she LOVES Buckley’s version of this song. just for you K. [ed- she texted me that she feels like the song mirrors my relationship life. i told her it seems to parrot my having to leave women behind often.]

i introduced her to SKM. it’s now her favorite band. this is her jam. babe, remember that drive to st. augustine? lol.

where the “blue skies” line comes from.

stay up

18 Comments on “I Know it’s Over”

  1. theasdgamer says:

    Danny, you know, signals get crossed all the time between men and women. I think that there are communication issues due to not understanding how the other sex thinks.

    May I give an example? I told a woman that one of my favorite books is “To Ride, Shoot Straight, and Speak the Truth.” She knew that I was married and I told her that I wasn’t attracted to her. I flirted with her in a specific, limited context for a specific, limited purpose unrelated to sex or a STR. She took all that I said as if I was practicing plausible deniability in order to instigate sex. She had no concept of what I meant by “Truth.” Hence, all my effort to communicate with her was ineffective. She is a girly-girl and prefers to avoid linear thinking, sticking more to social/emotional thinking. It can be very challenging to communicate effectively with women about sexual and relational things.

    Regarding K, perhaps she thought that you were denying your true intentions and that you couldn’t possibly suppress your feelings for her.

  2. unsigma says:

    Saw her once or twice a month? Bully for women to be able to live with only one or two uppy-downys a month, but “da menz” be cut from another cloth.

    And, DUDE! Held the strong frame AND contained the explosion. Nice work.

  3. aneroidocean says:

    “what is it with you guys and your dicks? you guys are so bad about opening up.” i looked at her, smiled, and said, “thats EXACTLY what i was talking about. ‘opening YOU up’.”


    Well, she knew from the start. This is my policy as well. It’s a tough line to figure out how to walk, but once you do it’s much much better all around.

    • dannyfrom504 says:

      nope. being open from the start absolves you of any “dirt”. i TOLD her that i was leaving in april. that she wasn’t my gf. that if she met a potential bf prospect….i’d happily support her.

      like i said, i’m gone.

  4. vlarosa13 says:

    Great post! Thanks for sharing your words and the music. I love SKM and “Moorestown” is a great song…particularly since I used to live there a few years back.

  5. I thought I was the only one who ever heard of Warpaint.

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