Pasta Alfredo ala Danny

mom came back from vegas after being gone for a week so Brody wanted to go pay a visit. i was kinda hungry and knew mom wasn’t in the mood to cook, so i decided to go with the first thing she taught me how to cook- fettuchini alfredo. interestingly enough, she taught me to cook it because i wanted to take this girl to dinner and FA was her fave.

“you like this girl son?” mom asked inquisitively. i nodded yes and she said, “any asshole with a credit card can take a woman out to eat, but if you cook for her she’ll be REALLY impressed and she’ll never forget you.”

God damn if she wasn’t 100% correct.

i invited her over and mom went shopping, the stepdad was playing golf, but my little sis stayed behind. i cooked the dinner, steamed some asparagus (place the spears in 3-4 paper towels, wet the towels and microwave for about 3 minutes or until done), and we ate. girl looked like she injected heroin. then we went up to my room and caught some stink finger and tit.

what, i was in 8th grade. i got the +1 a week later. catholic school girls FTW.

FA alfredo i EASY to make. melt 1/2 stick butter, or more if you like. once melted add one small carton (i think they’re 8oz.) of heavy whipping cream or half and half. bring to a low boil. lower heat and slowly mix in 1/2 cup parmesan cheese. lit simmer on low for 20-30 minutes until reduced and tightened up. salt to taste. add whatever cooked pasta you like. voila. as you add each ingredient have some fun and imitate julia childs.

for Alfredo ala Danny use shells, brown one cubed chicken breast. saute baby bella mushrooms and add one small jar of progress marinated artichoke hearts (strain off 90% of the fluid). add the above after you mix in the parmesan cheese and begin to reduce the sauce to allow the ingredients to blend.

c’est si bon

latah brah

so good you’ll have to touch yourself after.